Bro Bits #8: Game Preview: BSU vs. BYE

For the second time this season, Boise State faces a faceless opponent: BYE. 1boisebro takes a look at what it'll take for BSU to say goodbye to a good BYE this weekend.

Week after week, nationally ranked teams get burned by BYE. Even without a loss, teams can be dropped in the polls during their BYE week.

A scheduling quirk means the Broncos are once again face-to-face with BYE. Boise State survived the first encounter relatively unscathed, but how about the second? What, besides the inevitable passage of time, will it take for BSU overcome a dangerous yet welcome BYE?

Let's analyze.

BYE Keys to the Game:

1) Find an offense.

First of all, BYE has no offense. I mean none. For BYE, yards are harder to find than a pig roast at a PETA convention. Yards are to BYE what snakes are to cuddly. Hello BYE, I'm yards, we've never met. If yards were dates, BYE would be... well, uh... me.

Let's move on.

2) Discover a defense.

BYE has no defense. It's like they don't even show up. But then, against the Broncos, who does?

3) Special teams, hello?

Special teams haven't been so special for BYE this season. In fact, it's been more non-existent than a hot meal on a Southwest Airlines flight.

4) Wear blue.

I assume they already do. I sure couldn't see them on the blue turf in the previous BSU/BYE contest. They must've been wearing blue to blend in with the field and render themselves invisible, which, come to think of it, must've make it incredibly difficult for the BYE quarterback to find his own receivers...

5) Have Trev "Nebraska Let Texas Tech Score 70 To Prove Some Point" Alberts coach the team.

Why? Because only Trev "My Mom Couldn't Finish Spelling Trevor" Alberts is hollow enough to coach BYE. He'd fit right in.

 

BSU Keys to the Game:

1) Don't play.

That would be embarrassing. Trev "Opinions Are Like Me" Alberts would have a field day if the Broncos showed up against BYE. By the way, what is a "field day"? Is that a reference to farmers? Are farmers perpetually happy and successful people because every day for them is a "field day," or are they merely happy and successful because they're critically important to the overall health and well-being of our planet?

2) Contain the excitement.

Easier said than done. Most players likely watch other college football games during their BYE week and scream at the television, or play NCAA 2005 on PS2 and scream at the television, or "date," possibly screaming. It'd be better if they saved their energy for their next opponent.

Or perhaps they should use their time studying for their Molecular Genetics final. I certainly wouldn't want these young chaps screwing up my precious molecules in some future medical incident because they'd preferred to "date" than study in college.

Though maybe they could genetically create a brain for Trev "Look mom, I'm on TV!" Alberts.

(I don't like Trev "Mark May Punch Me" Alberts. Perhaps you've noticed. Trev Alberts sucks like the Big Bang blew. That is, until he says nice things about Boise State, which likely won't happen any time in the next, oh, 50 or 60 years, if ever...)

Sorry. Let's move on. Again.

3) Hope all other ranked 1A teams lose.

Seems like a childish and petty thing, but that's the current BCS-led NCAA-1A-College-Football world for you. The only way to guarantee BSU doesn't loose ground in the polls is to wish bad things for the rest of the teams currently ranked.

 

So there you have it. Things certainly look good for Boise State to overcome their second encounter with BYE! Let's hope they do.

Go Broncos!


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