Not a creature was bowling, not even the band.
These Gators feel strange, without bowl gifts to unwrap,
And they're licking their wounds (literally), from a season of mishaps.
It started in August, with two major blows,
A lineman named Green, a receiver Debose.
Neither saw the field, for the Gators this year,
Lucky for them, cuz it was quite queer.
It went bad in Miami, a five turnover game,
They had no one else, but themselves to blame.
Then Tennessee at home, with a really big blow,
The offensive leader went down, at the start of the show.
Driskel would miss, the rest of the season,
The year was just nuts, no rhyme or reason.
From the ashes rose a flicker, a possible star,
But his fame was short lived, before he bore some scars.
Murphy was brave, played through pain and was sup-ah,
But bolted in December, we hardly knew ya.
The defense shone early, indeed it was beastly,
But the pain struck again, took the best we called Easley.
The spirit was dampened, for a crew needing a lift,
But Santa didn't deliver, any Gator a gift.
Then came the losses, seven in a row,
Lots of ranked teams, and a Double-A blow.
Injuries to Moore, Humphries, Jones, Morrison, Taylor, and Anzalone.
Couldn't the injury bug, leave us alone?
The team was rocked, and Shands was full,
Recruiting was tough, top guys hard to pull.
Inevitably something harsh had to be done,
Muschamp dropped a Pease bomb and also Tim Davis was gone.
The offense was awful, three years at the bottom,
Play makers are needed, but who could we count on?
Because of this problem, Muschamp stayed on the trail,
Goal of a top recruiting class, he just can't fail.
He worked the phones to find a new coach,
But not till the dead period did he approach.
Talent is needed and the class start is great,
He needs more horses to call his team great.
The leader has never wavered a bit,
Will Grier is the man, with the fans a big hit.
Five-star caliber gunner, who could pose as a runner,
He's from Tarheel Country, Coach's son and a wonder.
This guy named Cook, he's been making us worry,
The Noles and Canes are knocking, they pounced in a hurry.
With the Gator ‘O' looking iffy, he may have been looking,
But Will Muschamp had a better plan a cooking.
Cook would declare at his final game,
His recruitment was over, no one else to be seen.
A Nole coach thought he was crafty, didn't follow Cook's quip,
Showed up when the bus returned, from the state championship.
T'was a short encounter, and likely not fun,
But there was one visit left, for his team number one.
Muschamp scheduled the last home visit the last day,
Cook said no visitors, but of this he gave way.
Four hours in home, the visit went well,
Was supposed to be quiet, but… oh well.
We will know in a week if the visit paid off,
Bet he puts on a Gator hat and has a rowdy send off.
His bud Ermon Lane is another big get,
But likes to play on Twitter and make Gators fret.
At the end of the day Quincy will help keep him in line,
To help the Gators ‘O' finally shine.
Of course others are needed and the list could be long,
But maybe seven spots remain in a class that looks strong.
Of Rudolph, and Jackson, of Adams we pray,
That they would come to Gainesville to play.
Willis, and Tabor, and Sims another one,
Would be welcome to join us in the fun .
But alas some hope comes on the coaching end,
The night before Christmas brings us a new friend.
Like two girls for one guy, a "Three's Company" show,
That lucky guy Jack had Janet and Chrissy in tow.
Muschamp flew North and who did he chauffer,
A new guy in charge of the ‘O'... Mr. Roper.
A 2013 Broyles finalist is he,
A true quarterback coach, soon we will see.
It's been missing for half a decade,
Now we're back to Driskel who soon will be made.
Into a big time thrower, someone we can trust,
To lead an offense that now is a bust.
Alas one more piece of the puzzle is near,
An O–Line coach from Texas soon shall appear.
He's the top guy around, and another big need,
For an offense that has been dead in the weeds.
Then on to signing day to really get busy,
And stop this tailspin making us dizzy.
Better times ahead we all hope we'll see,
And establish a new dynasty.
And with that we say Merry Christmas to you,
And add a mighty Go Gators too!