The Professional Fanatic, Issue 1

"The Professional Fanatic," is a new weekly column brought to you by staff writer/analyst, Jared Bonshire. In the first in a series of columns to come, Bonshire describes what's so great about being a sports fan; "The ups, the downs, the friends, the disregard of loved ones, yes there is nothing better than being a fanatic. Well, maybe something, getting paid for it."

The Professional Fanatic - Summer Sports
by: Jared Bonshire

Volume 1, Issue 1


Those beautiful and crazy days of summer.

At least beautiful in the eyes of those who revel in the beauty of summer sports. All these fantastic summer sports; like the 11 year NBA playoffs, baseball, hockey…

Nahh, I'm from Kentucky; hockey doesn't count.

Horse Racing, now that's more like it. Nothing like leaving the house with hundreds of dollars in your pocket, and coming home with thousands of lint balls in return. Hey look the Lakers are playing….

Okay, hmmm, well maybe baseball IS America's pastime, although I'm not sure when America's pastime became the worlds strongest man competition.

It is still pretty entertaining to watch Barry Bonds dragging a boulder as he rounds third though. Maybe I can start on that workout plan, just so lashing out at the media will seem so right.

Is that Bill Walton I hear? I never knew Shaq and Kobe were so stupendously incredible with fantastic ability to deceive their defender…

Wait a minute, golf is on! Yeah! Volvo PGA Championship coming up, with an excellent field of talent and prestige (not even golf can have an innovative character name for its institutions…..wonder when we will see Veejay Ford play..). Don't get me wrong, there is nothing I enjoy sucking at more than golf, but what in the world is a sport that allows its players to not play simply because he/she doesn't feel like it?

Hot dang, Shaq missed a free throw….

Tennis. The dignitaries game.

Fun to watch, engaged with drama, suspense, and the play of Andre Agassi. Lets see what ole' Andre is up too at the French Open….

Haehnul..Haenuhul…Hae……who beat Agassi? First grand slam ever?

Is there anyone who doesn't speak a foreign language or date Mandy Moore that plays good tennis anymore?

Ugh, but at least the Lakers are on TV….

The options are done, finished, caput, ver do, cuit, and still with nothing to follow.

I miss my winter sports; college football, college basketball, pro football, pro bas…..okay nevermind, but pro football.

There is just something magical about the beginning of September. It's hot. It's muggy. I'm sweaty and the gut is filled with brats.

But for now I guess I will just settle for whatever it is I can find on the tube.

Are the summer Olympics on? Will there be anybody worth watching for the USA that didn't get thrown out due to that dang gone San Franciscan steroid peddler?

But wait!

There are summer camps, combines, and all kinds of recruiting mayhem going on now that can grasp my attention. I simply cannot wait to over-hype a young man causing him to overestimate his own abilities creating an oversized ego that bursts the first time he steps foot on a Division I campus, which leads to a transfer, a failing grade and an unhappy undergraduate experience! Yee Hawww!!

Eh, I wonder if the Lakers are still playing….

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