Well maybe that's a little drastic, but not by much.
"I'm playing quarterback, tight end, receiver, running back, linebacker, punter and punt returner," Carlo Calabrese said.
So how does that work?
"They're just going to call a signal out," Calabrese explained. "When they call Florida, it will be like Tim Tebow, and I'll be quarterback."
Four different signals, on four different plays, could see Calabrese lining up in four different spots in one series.
The 6-foot-2, 235-pound Calabrese has played every one of those positions in his three years of varsity football, but never all at the same time.
The current Irish verbal commit made the Verona varsity as a freshman, becoming the first players since former Notre Dame standout Anthony Fasano to do so. That season, the four-star player led the team in tackles with 58, and helped Verona advance to the state title game. Also the backup quarterback, Calabrese had to start the state championship game because of an injury to the starter.
Verona lost the state title game, and Calabrese came back as a sophomore to make 53 tackles despite missing four-and-a-half games with an injury. He also had four touchdowns receptions as a tight end.
Junior year saw Calabrese get the majority of the work at quarterback. He led the team to an 11-2 record, and also had 104 tackles and six sacks from his middle linebacker spot. During that campaign, Calabrese's backup at quarterback was able to earn game reps, preparing him to take the starting job the next fall.
Now Verona's best player can move all over the field.
"He does a little bit of everything and it kind of shows he is such a great athlete," head coach Lou Racioppe said. "And it shows he has a real knowledge of the game in that he can step in and play each one of those positions and not miss a beat."
"I like it," Calabrese stated.
Calabrese and his teammates have just begun two-a-day workouts. He said the new-look offense has been a smooth transition.
"It's different formations but the same plays."
The season kicks off on Sept. 13th, and Calabrese will be carrying 10 more pounds of muscles from the year before.
"We're going to go deep into the playoffs," Calabrese said. "We're going to win state. We have a good team this year.
"I worked hard as hell in the off-season, lifting and running everyday. Just eating the right foods. I think I'll be a lot better this year."
Calabrese is now bench pressing 350 pounds, and squatting 450.
"He's had a great off-season getting himself ready physically," Racioppe said. "Not only is he big and solid, but he is as strong as can be and it doesn't look like he's lost any of the speed he's had."
While Calabrese has to think about playing all these different positions, at least he doesn't have to give a thought to what college he'll be attending. Calabrese gave his verbal pledge to Notre Dame head coach Charlie Weis back in May.
When Calabrese arrives in South Bend, the only position on the football field he'll have to worry about is middle linebacker.
Calabrese will use his official visit to Notre Dame for the Syracuse game.
"I think they're going to be good," Calabrese said of his future teammates.
Calabrese keeps in regular touch with fellow verbal commit Tyler Stockton. He also got a chance to talk with Fasano shortly after he made up his mind on Notre Dame, picking the Irish over Florida, Boston College, Rutgers, Pittsburgh and Syracuse.
"He said it's a great school." Calabrese is good friends with Fasano's younger brother. "He said it's hard, but you just have to do the work and you'll get good grades."
It's obvious Calabrese knows how to work.