It's a Pop Quiz; It's a Pop Quiz

This week's Arizona game was a lot of fun. The weather was perfect, the offense had its best game since the start of conference play, and the Beaver defense rendered the Arizona offense as ineffective as a 5th legislative session in Salem. The Beaver defense has not allowed an Arizona touchdown since 1999 (That's three years for any Duck fans reading this article.). Here is a 15 question pop quiz, just to make sure you were paying attention on Saturday.

The Beaver defense had six sacks, lots of quarterback hurries, and it seemed like Jason Johnson got knocked down on every passing play. Which part of Jason’s body has the most bruises?
A. His legs.
B. His upper torso.
C. His fanny.
D. His ego.
E. All of the above.

Nick Barnett had another monster game. If you had a vote that counted, and you could vote today, would he get your vote for PAC-10 defensive player of the year?
A. Yes.
B. Definitely yes.
C. Most certainly yes.
D. Not if you’re Richard Seigler’s mom.

Who had a better game, the defensive linemen, linebackers, or the secondary?
A. Linemen.
B. Linebackers.
C. Safeties.
D. Cornerbacks.
E. Yes.

The wide receivers’ blocking was a thing of beauty. All of them did a good job; which one seemed (in my inexpert opinion) to do a little extra good?
A. Jayson Boyd
B. Kenny Farley
C. Cole Clasen
D. I don’t know, but I saw Steven Jackson get up after a long run and personally thank #2 for his downfield blocking.

Speaking of receivers, how many passes were dropped this week?
A. Five
B. Four
C. Does the one by Seth Lacey count?
D. Too many.

The offensive line played their best conference game to date. Their improvement is making many people happy; who is the happiest?
A. The offensive lineman themselves.
B. The offensive line coaches.
C. Derek Anderson’s chiropractor.
D. Derek Anderson’s mom.

Which penalty drew the most boos?
A. The pass interference on Terrell.
B. The holding call negating Steven Jackson’s 69-yard run.
C. The holding call on Terrell.
D. The combo 30-yard penalty. “It’s first down and 42!”

Which sentence below is NOT a mispronunciation of #46’s name?
A. “Look, I just got Yuuhlanammy’s autograph!”
B. “Look, I just got Whylineamammy’s autograph!”
C. “Look, I just got Whylamininny’s autograph!”
D. “Look, I just got Curt’s autograph!”

Steven Jackson is an awe inspiring sight busting through the line, outrunning defenders, dreadlocks flying in the wind. His hairdo has inspired some copycatting.
True/False—Dreadlocks look just as good on a pot-bellied 45-year-old orange-and-black-face-painted dude as they do on Steven. T____ F____.

The defensive lineman had (once again, in my inexpert opinion) their best PAC-10 game too. They stuffed the run, and decimated Arizona’s passing game.
True/False—Eric Manning really meant it when he said, “We were trying for negative-100 yards.” T_____ F_____


I don’t usually follow the NFL, but I noticed that Joey Harrington pulled the “Captain Comeback” routine for Detroit.
True/False—It kills you, a Beaver fan, to have to admit J5P still has that end of the game comeback mojo. T____ F____.

True/False—Every porta-potty at Reser has an empty Jack Daniels lying on the floor or in its urinal after every home game. T____ F____

Who accidentally knocked over more kids in the end zone after the game?
A. The Toe.
B. Webmaster Dan.
C. You mean this week?

How many people were hit in the head/back/lower body by errant kicks from would-be field goal kickers after the game?
A. 10
B. 20
C. 30
D. I don’t know, but it’s sure entertaining to watch it happen. It’s the one football play that never grows old.

True/False—I get a prize from for getting all of these answers correct. T_____ F_____


(I know, I know, it’s Kirk. Hey, every Pop Quiz has to have at least one trick question.)

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