The Wiseguy: Week 2

I RAN THE table last week and went 9-0. Don't expect this every time -- the cheesecake non-conference schedule won't last forever. The talk of Week 1, of course, was the punch thrown and subsequent rampage by the Ducks' LeGarrette Blount, which also gives the Beavers a deeper well of material for ripping on our friends and uniform obsessed creatures from down South.

That sleeper Heisman run for LeGarrette Blount all the Duck fans have been shouting about all offseason? As was prognosticated in this space last week, a proven pipedream. Let's see what other stuff I can do..

Stanford @ Wake Forest
The Cardinals go on the road for a second straight week and Jim Harbaugh will be lost without his presidential suite potty. Forced to do his last minute game planning in a North Carolina Honey Bucket, Harbaugh is bound to make a mistake at a critical juncture.
Pick: Wake Forest

Idaho @ Washington
The Huskies look like an improved team. Once again their elitist alumni can dig into their pockets and not feel so guilty about it. (We're talking about above-board monies here, not the illegal kind that sunk the Lavender Ship 'lo these many years ago.) The Vandals aren't "awesome" enough, they will get vandalized.
Pick: Washington

UCLA @ Tennessee
The Bruins of L.A. will be out of sorts in Knoxville. They won't find any gourmet coffee shops, won't understand what the hell the locals are saying and they will be blinded by a sea of orange. The Vols band is already playing that annoying Rocky Top tune.
Pick: Tennessee

Eastern Washington @ No. 10 California
The Bears don't look like cubs this year -- some are even starting to believe they won't tail off into an Oregon Duckesque fade at the end of the year! Radio personality Colin Cowherd is a EWU alumnus, but he won't be on the field Saturday. This one is gonna get ugly, real ugly.
Pick: California

Hawaii @ Washington State (game in Seattle, WA)
The Cougs have a chance to dance and a small window of opportunity for a win. But, of course, they won't. The bigger question is if Greg McMackin will refer to them with a slur in his post game press conference.
Pick: Hawaii

USC No. 3 @ No. 8 Ohio State
The University of Spoiled Children gets up for these types of games. "The" Ohio State was almost "The" Team Embarrassed by Navy last week. The Big-10 remains, this year, overrated. And their standard bearer is Ohio State, with or without a "The".
Pick: USC

Northern Arizona @ Arizona
The Lumberjacks are projected to be about fourth in the Big Sky -- a win in Tucson will be very difficult. But they do have a chance, and the reason is simple -- Mike "Oh I do not look like Barney Rubble" Stoops.
Pick: Arizona

Purdue @ Oregon
The meltdown has begun toward a 0-12 season -- we can really call them the Zeros then. Nah, they won't lose them all. And okay, it's a bias pick here this week, but seriously, the Ducks just really aren't that good. On the field, anyway. In the Octagon on PPV, well, that's probably another story. Hey, that Purdue guy just called you a bad word, Oregon players. Go Rock 'em and Sock 'em Ducks!
Pick: Purdue

Oregon State @ UNLV
Good thing it's an 8pm kickoff for the OSU fans -- a Friday night party gone long in Las Vegas gives allows to recoup. After Jacquizz rushes for 200 yards, the Rebels won't want anyone to know about their defense. What happens in.. oh, whatever.
Pick: Oregon State

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