Diary Of A College Football Fan
(Disclaimer: This is not the personal diary of the author.)
Saturday, 4:45 PM
I'm out here in the sunshine, tailgating with my posse. Grillin', chillin', drinkin'. Getting ready for the game later tonight. Checking out the ladies, and bantering with the visiting team's fans with a little ol' fashion trash talking. Life is beautiful. I love college football. I love my team.
Saturday, 11:46 PM
I'm so pissed, I can't go to sleep. My beloved team blew a 10 point lead in the fourth quarter and lost in OT. How could they lose to THAT team? Hey ref's! Thanks for nothing. Why can't our conference get decent officiating? Why can't our kicker make a field goal? Why can't our coaches coach? Why can't our coaches recruit? I hate reading all of the taunts from the other team's fans on the internet message boards. Lowlifes. Every single one of them. I wish I were the one laying down the smack tonight.
Sunday, 10:59 AM
Great. Not only did my team blow it last night, I'm also hung-over like a big dog. To top it off, the local paper put our loss on Page 1, with a big color photo to boot!. How come when we win, it's buried on Page 5? Why can't the local paper support our team? Now it's time for me to rant on the message board. Maybe that will make me feel better. Gonna blast some of our players, especially our field goal kicker. Nothing makes me feel better than trashing 19 year old student-athletes. Prima donnas. Getting their education on a silver platter. Maybe I won't donate to the scholarship foundation next year. Maybe I'll cancel my season tickets. Maybe I just won't attend another game, ever.
Sunday, 9:45 PM
Well that felt good. Hangover is gone, too. Getting that off my chest made me feel so much better. Who cares if the parents of those players read what I wrote? They should tell their kids to play harder. What does it matter? The moderator of the board deleted half my posts anyway. That Nazi! I think I'll be fine now.
Monday, 2:19 PM
Well this sucks. Just when I start to feel better, all my "friends" at work are teasing me about my team's loss over the weekend. Some a-hole even put Page 1 of yesterday's sports section on my chair. I should have called in sick. I'm sitting here, reading the old message board, while I should be working, and it's pissing me off to no end. I'm angry now. I'm angry at our coaches, who can't coach; can't recruit; and can't even manage the game clock. By golly, they should all be fired. And you know what? So should our athletic director, and the school president. I think I'll just write exactly that on the message board. That'll teach those lazy, do-nothing know-it-alls.
Tuesday, 8:45 PM
Time to start thinking about the next game, but I just can't get past last weekend. Continued to rag on our players and coaches on the message board, and then I went after those glass-half full fans of ours that see everything through rose colored glasses. Thank goodness I'm a REALIST. I'm smarter than all of them because I refuse to drink the Kool-aid that is served up by our head coach.
Wednesday, 12:19 PM
I'm reading through the messages posted by the fans of our opponent this weekend. Arrogant bastards. They come on OUR board and think their team is going to crush US? Hah! I gave it right back to them (even though I'm not sure my team can pull it off). What I'm I to do? I gotta protect our home turf. Nobody comes on our board and badmouths our players and coaches.
Thursday, 7:19 PM
I took a visit to our opponent's message board. I was tired of reading of their cockiness about this Saturday's game. Why can't those people be classy like our fans are? I gave them a taste of their own medicine on their own site. I can throw out smack with the best of them.
Friday, 11:59 PM
I'm so stoked for tomorrow's game. I'm starting to feel better about our chances. We've got bigger linemen, faster receivers, and we're playing at home in front of great fans like myself. I can't wait for that game to be over, with a big ol' "W" in the win/lose column. I just might rush the field and tear down the goalpost.
Saturday, 4:45 PM
I'm out here in the sunshine, tailgating with my posse. Grillin', chillin', drinkin'. Getting ready for the game later tonight. I'm checking out the ladies, and bantering with the visiting team's fans with a little ol' fashion trash talking. Life is beautiful. I love college football. I love my team....
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Diary Of A College Football Fan
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