Post-Tennessee stress disorder

Playing the Tennessee Vols this fall is kind of like eating a hot tamale right before bedtime. It's fun while you're doing it but, odds are, you're going to pay for it later.

Like Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Post-Tennessee Stress Disorder takes its toll in belated fashion. Based on a 1-3 record, the Vols obviously aren't whipping up on the opposition, yet they seem to be softening up the opposition. Incredibly, the teams the Big Orange has played to date have a combined record of 1-5 SINCE facing the Vols... and the lone victory came at the expense of a Div. 1-AA program, Alabama State.

You didn't think I'd drop a stat like that on you without substantiation, did you?

Here it is:

- Since beating Tennessee 27-24 on Sept. 1, UCLA is 0-3. The Bruins lost to Brigham Young 59-0, to Arizona State 31-10 and to Fresno State 36-31.

- Since losing to Tennessee 35-3 on Sept. 13, UAB is 1-1. The Blazers beat Alabama State 45-10, then lost to South Carolina 26-13.

- Since beating Tennessee 30-6 on Sept. 20, Florida is 0-1. The Gators were shocked 31-30 at home last weekend by an Ole Miss team that came in riding a nine-game SEC losing streak.

Given all of the above, Auburn head man Tommy Tuberville must realize his team has no chance this weekend against Vanderbilt in Nashville. After all, the Tigers beat Tennessee 14-12 last Saturday, which means they may not win another game the rest of the season.

Perhaps the Surgeon General should require a warning label be placed on the helmet of each Volunteer player: Facing Tennessee may be hazardous to your record ... eventually.

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