What's next for UT football?

Most reporters wait until after something happens to write about it. I'm going to scoop the world and tell you what's going to happen in University of Tennessee football BEFORE it happens:

- Lane Kiffin will hire his father, Monte, as defensive coordinator.

- Lane Kiffin will hire his brother, Chris, as special teams coach.

- Lane Kiffin will hire his lovely wife, Layla, as director of coaching clinics.

- All of the spots in Tennessee's coaching clinics for 2009, 2010 and 2011 will be filled within 24 hours.

- Layla Kiffin will give birth to the couple's third child. To solidify his popularity among UT fans, Lane will name his son Robert Neyland Kiffin.

- Lane Kiffin will retain running backs coach Stan Drayton and wide receivers coach Latrell Scott from the 2008 Vol staff.

- Lane Kiffin will hire Robert Neyland Kiffin as assistant to the director of coaching clinics (his mom).

- South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier will grumble that UT broke an NCAA rule by hiring a newborn.

- Lane Kiffin, having no more kinfolk available, will fill out his coaching staff with people who are not related to him.

- Layla Kiffin announces she is expecting. Preliminary plans call for the child, regardless of gender, to be named Peyton Manning Kiffin.

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