Welcome to another season of football in the academically, chemically, and legally suspect Southeastern conference. The Great Pumpkin at UTK wants to institute T-Ball rules, where you can have as many (drug) strikes as you want. The Evil Genius at South Carolina threatens to quit if he can't enroll any he wants, regardless of their academic abilities.

Pete's Pigskin Prognostications
Week 1
(0-0, 0-0)
Frequently in error, never in doubt

So far I haven't heard if he is going to go to the mat over gun law violations, but you can bet he's in there pitching. His guy was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Yeah, right.

For those of you who want to see picks against the spread, go elsewhere. For the rest of you.........

Western Carolina @ Alabama – Can the most expensive coach in the league get things started right from the first game? Compass point schools are tailor-made for quick starts. Alabama by 31.

Troy @ Arkansas – The Trojans begin their season of SEC hell with the Razorbacks. Arkansas may have trouble early, but will prevail by 17.

Kansas St. @ Auburn – A good early test for the War Eagles. Not a compass-point patsy, but Auburn by 10.

Western Kentucky @ Florida – The Hilltoppers won't have much success on the flat tidal plain of Florida. Gators by 45.

Oklahoma State @ Georgia – News from Georgia has been strangely lacking this offseason. Oklahoma State will be no walkover for the Dawgs, but I can't see them losing the first game at home. Georgia by 10.

Eastern Kentucky @ Kentucky – Another compass point cupcake. Wildcats by 28.

Mississippi @ Memphis – The tigers will continue their downward trend. West replaced most of the coaches because he couldn't replace the players, and the fans demanded SOME sort of action. Mississippi may be the worst in the SEC this year, but should be slightly better than Memphis. Mississippi by 5.

LSU @ Mississippi State – Probably Sylvester Croom's last year as head coach. If he's going to turn it around, the LSU game isn't a good place to try to start. LSU by 21.

Louisiana-Lafayette @ South Carolina – Spurrier should be very familiar with La-La land. He seems to spend most of his waking hours there. Chickens by 42.

UTK @ California – What could Phil have been thinking? The first game of the year is the "suspension" game; a cupcake so he can suspend and punish everyone who didn't go to chair-stacking class in summer school. Cal was embarrassed last year and will be thirsting for revenge. Here's hoping.....Cal 31 – 27.

Richmond @ Vanderbilt – This has the potential to be a watershed year for the Commodores. The faithful with gold-colored glasses think the stars are aligned to produce the first bowl tem since the '82 team. This game won't go very far towards giving any indication one way or the other. Vandy by 35.

Flames or comments can be delivered at Top Stories