OREGON at ARIZONA STATE
Just three weeks ago ABC TV was drooling over this match-up as a potential battle for the Pac-10 crown. Three weeks ago I was swimming in a lake. Three weeks ago Gary Coleman thought he'd be the next Governor of California. You get the point.
PICK: SUN DEVILS
UCLA at ARIZONA
The jury is still out, but "Heavner" is either the best or the worst name of a QB I've heard in sometime. I'll let you know what I decide.
The Westwoodies plan to stick with QB Drew (Who?) Olson this weekend when they visit "The House that Mackovic Built," even if Matt (No) Moore is fit to play. Not that it really matters who they line up behind center. It's not like they're playing San Diego State.
STANFORD at SOUTHERN CAL
Robber Barons defense (Buddy's Bullies) proclaim they will hold high-flying U$C Chowjans to 17 points. Do you think they meant per quarter?
With QB Matt Leinart nursing a bum ankle and his two backups nursing crappy play, Toejams are considering flaming the redshirt of freshman John David Booty. Likely we won't know until game time whether or not Pete Clairol will make a Booty call. (Sorry, it's a bye week.)
NEVADA at WASHINGTON
My daughter is invited to a birthday party for the nephew of Wolfpack coach Chris Tormey. If Nevada wins we're getting him a pony.
Regina Williams can't shake Matt "Hard" Ware during the Mutts second half meltdown against UCLA, yet declares afterward that Ware "sucks." Coincidentally, George Armstrong Custer said the exact same thing about Sitting Bull in the waning moments of Little Big Horn.
LAST WEEK: 2-3