Ramble On! Pac-10 Picks, Week Ten

ITS BEEN OVER a year since I've been relegated to the radio for my Cougar Fix, and I can't say it was a pleasure to take the trip back. Now I have nothing against BobRob and Jimbo, I just have serious issues trying to figure out what I'm supposed to be looking at when I'm screaming and which direction to throw the nearest magazine/pillow/bottle when there isn't really a target.

Probably the most frustrating part of listening to the game late was listening to Walden complain about the calls. I'm yelling along with him, "Yeah refs, get your heads in the game" or something a little less clean, all the while never actually seeing the play he's upset about.

And just when I'm hoping it will get easier: I'll be relying on text messages during a wedding tomorrow.

On a more urgent note than Jeff Godford's audition at America's Ugliest Boating Destination this weekend, Husky fans are more concerned with the fact that Ohio State's penalty could have implications on their program. Although the boosters at UW are as corrupt and crooked as the rest of them, this year they have an excuse: they're giving cars to their players in hopes they'll drive far, far away from Seattle, and never come back. Bears

UCLA looks to win for their first November victory since, well….let's put it this way: since the last time UCLA won a game between Halloween and Thanksgiving, there have been no less than FIVE events with the words "Celebrity" and "Boxing". Here's to many more bouts of Todd Bridges and Tonya Harding overshadowing the annual UCLA swoon. Oh and, um, Mr. Lewis: Catch the ball this week! Ducks

Does Reser make Pea Soup? A more pressing issue than watching Oregon State fade at the end of their USC matchup last week was the fact that I felt that smacking the side of my television would actually clear the fog in Corvallis. I'm sure many people in Palo Alto found themselves performing the same task, wondering if it was it was their television that deceived them, or if Andrew Walter really did throw for about a thousand yards and fifteen touchdowns on them in the span of a quarter. Buddy's job is safe this year, but with Cal looming, looks like the Cougs get to be his marquee win this year. Beavers

It's hard-work staying on the wrong end of the class-spectrum: on one hand, the country could see a game where we send off an American hero into the memory books with his alma mater celebrating a victory in his honor. On the other hand, we could watch a game that puts us one step closer to sending a bunch of drunken Cougs to Vegas on Christmas. And I get to cheer for the latter. Sorry Pat, don't know what to tell you, other than I'm glad you didn't have to play for Dirkles. Cougs

After wasting literally an entire week of my life playing Halo 2 (well, my dad will call it "wasting". It's completely justifiable in my book…) I am actually forced to come up with something clever to say about this stinker of a game. Can the recruits play? Would that make this more interesting? Should Matt Leinart throw with his opposite hand? Can we put Norm Chow in at slotback? I want to think of some reason to be interested in this game, but just can't. There's just nothing compelling except it will be the first Stoops to fall to Carroll this season. Perhaps it's an omen. Now if you'll excuse me, I have aliens to kill. Trojans

Last week: 4-1
Season Total: 37-18

If you could have only seen the dance moves I pulled off in my living room during the first half of the Oklahoma St/Texas game, which I had the Cowboys with the moneyline. The spectacle could have only been matched by watching me try to tear out my carpet during the second half. I've been treading water for weeks now, and I'm starting to lose faith I'll be able to get to the Promised Land by the end of the season. Toshiba Fund III has tripled since last month, but frankly I need to triple it again…. and most likely again for it to be enough. So we're shaking things up!

Toshiba Fund III Week 7 ($336)
Three team Parlay ($168)
Oregon St (even money) over Stanford
Cal (-30) over Washington
Oregon (-6) over UCLA

Notre Dame (-11) over Pittsburgh: $84
Iowa (+3) over Minnesota: $84

Have a question or comment? Need a stock tip? Can't find a date for your High School Reunion (or better yet, your prom?) Hit up the mailbag at ramble_on@comcast.net

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