Who's up and who's down this week on Planet Coug?
|Quirky Coaches||He hasn't smiled since Neil Diamond went to sequins, but what really separates Ty Willy from the Pac are personal pronouns. Envision this typical Ty conversation ... So Coach, how do you plan to contain Jerome Harrison? RESPONSE: "Tyrone Willingham does not speculate on skill-position players who are not on the schedule this week." OK then. So Coach, if you were Ty Willingham, what would you say your thoughts are about coaching in the Apple Cup? RESPONSE: "Tyrone Willingham does not choose to speak for other people. Tyrone Willingham can only speak for himself." Real good then, Coach, but when will you be ready to talk? RESPONSE: "He doesn't know yet."|
|Zebras||These poor creatures from southeast Africa have the misfortune of being named after another, lesser form of life that roams the U.S. West Coast. Unlike the majestic, savannah-loving type, the Pac-10 variety doesn't see well, is prone to fantastic hallucinations, is somehow mesmerized by the sweet nothings Dirk Koetter whispers into their ears, and is awfully protective of sitting ducks named Rudy.|
|The Ghost of Jackie Sherrill||Not since the lone season this horse's ass roamed the Palouse have the Cougs worn white trousers. Let's just hope last weekend's switch to pale pants wasn't a conscious decision, but too much bleach in the washing machine. While on track for the same 3-8 record Jackass posted in '76, do the guys on the field really have to look as bad, too? Here's to wishing some pigment makes its way into the Tide box before Oregon arrives.|
|Hosses||Old Buzz: If the Cougar offensive line can get its act together, 2005 should be a season to remember.
New Buzz: Mihlhauser, Holmes, Byrd, Harris and O'Connor are like Jerome Harrison's personal fleet of armored trucks. Now if the Cougar defense can just get its act together . . .
|General Electric||Just because the Cougs are malfunctioning at inopportune moments doesn't mean the statistical sanctuaries at Martin Stadium –- otherwise known as the Hustle Boards -- need to follow suit. They were lights out for the UCLA game and dim-bulbed for ASU. Time to get watt the program.|
|Big talk &
|This is actually a tidbit that appeared on one of the original Buzz Board's way back in the dark ages, but it's still valid today: For all the loyalty, fight and fury, Cougar fans are still dead last among Pac-10 and Big Ten schools when it comes to booster club membership and annual donations. As the old saying goes, it's time to put your money where your mouth is. To donate, head to www.athletics.wsu.edu/wsuaf/|
|Classy dudes||Rueben Mayes, the greatest running back in Cougar history, told Jerome Harrison he's rooting for him to break Mayes' 20-year-old single-season rushing record. Harrison, himself a class act, constantly tries to deflect attention to his offensive line.|
|Home jerseys, road pants||OK, so we have a thing about sartorial splendor. The school's colors are CRIMSON and gray, not red and gray. The road helmets are perfect, but everything else has us seeing red, all red.|
|Ed Murrow||Washington State's most celebrated alum, deceased more than 40 years, is suddenly a topic in every publication from Rolling Stone to the Bremerton Sun. And good reason. George Clooney's new movie about this giant of journalism is a work of art whose themes are as timely now as when Murrow himself was sounding them.|
|Jim Moore||Old Buzz: We love the Seattle P-I's Go2Guy.
New Buzz: We still love the knucklehead, but have decided he's no Ed Murrow after that column saying the Cougs stink and might well be 0-9 were it not for patsy non-conference games. His cutting invective violates the Eleventh Commandment of Cougar fandom: "Thou shalt not ever throw in the towel!" Shame, shame, shame, Jimmy. If you could stomach 1974-75-76, not to mention 1998-99-2000, you can surely get through this.
|TheJooce||He's not the most prolific message boarder around – though he has averaged exactly one posting per day for the last two years – but he's certainly one of the most objective. Neither a sappy cheerleader nor a vitriolic naysayer, he makes his points cleanly and fires periodic arrows of criticism without resorting to personal attacks.|
The BUZZ BOARD is back!
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