Ramble On! Pac-10 picks Week Four

BACK IN COLLEGE, I had a roommate named Nick. Great guy, but at times he defied common sense. Nick would head up on The Hill in nylon running shorts and Desert Storm-style safari hat. Yet he always found one of his roommates to walk to class with him. You know why? Because while Nick may have been a hopeless fool, but he was OUR hopeless fool. Which is why you won't see me badmouth Gordon Riese.

Sure, every Pac-10 team needs two hands to count the games Ol' Gordo has cost them over the years. But it's become part of the Pac-10 culture. There's tortillas on the field in Tempe, chainsaws on third down in Corvallis, and Gordon Riese making up rules like forward passes are actually counted as backward passes after the second overtime.

So boo to you and your cries of forfeits, Mr. Stoops. Those officials may have been incompetent idiots, but they are OUR incompetent idiots! They're not corrupt; they're just terrible! And I'll be damned if I'll let you come in here and tell them they can't wear their little red nylon running shorts.

ARIZONA STATE at CALIFORNIA
My favorite Dirkle-quote of the year: "Rudy is one of the best quarterbacks in the country. That guy can play. I'm always going to be harder on Rudy than I am on any other player because I know how well Rudy can play." The funny part is on his note-cards, the prepared answer actually said "Sam".
Pick: Bears

WASHINGTON STATE at STANFORD
Does anyone else in America think it's really fair that for ten games a year, Stanford starts Trent Edwards, but against the Cougs they put in John Elway? Now the only radio in my house that will pick up this game will be in my car, so out of respect for every other driver on the road, I will ask our coaches to watch for the quarterback draw on third-and-15 this year. Seriously, people may get rear-ended if you don't stop that this year.
Pick: Cougs

UCLA at WASHINGTON
Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops said this week he may cancel his trip to Husky Stadium in 2008 if the Pac-10 insists on using its own officials. Bobby, I have a couple names for your short-list. All of them have "@rambleon.com" concluding their e-mail addresses. We'd be thrilled to officiate a game so poorly; it'll make the Black Sox proud. Ever hear of a sixth down before? I already have seven different penalties planned just for wearing purple! Think about it…
Pick: Huskies

SOUTHERN CAL at ARIZONA
So apparently USC's upset at Brent Musberger for discussing John David Booty's hand signals to his receivers and potentially giving away secrets. I think we're actually at a point where Booty could go to the line and draw the defense a diagram of the play they're running and still gain twenty yards. The Trojans should actually be upset with the fact they didn't teach Reggie Bush the hand signal for, Don't take $100,000 from agents while you're still in school.
Pick: Trojans

IDAHO at OREGON STATE
I have an Idaho alum-friend who refers to her team as the Vandies. There really isn't a joke there; I just think it's cute. Vandies could possibly be the least intimidating nickname I can possibly think of. Well, except for the Beavers.
Pick: Beavs

Last Week: 7-1 Year to Date 20-6

UNCLE WOOD'S FUNTIME GAMBLING GRAB BAG
Now that it's a felony in Washington to gamble online, make sure all you wonderful Evergreen Staters make all your bets the safe way: through the loud guy in the dark corner named Boren. Man, two weeks in a row I've gone 2-2 here. I needed about 3 more botched onside-kick calls in that Oregon game to cover. Looking to break out of this non-losing funk with picks like:

Week 3: $100 (again)
Navy (-4) over Tulsa: $25
Oklahoma (-27 ½) over Middle Tennessee St: $25
Arizona St (+8) over Cal: $25
Minnesota (-3) over Purdue: $25


Have a question or comment? Need a stock tip? Can't find a date for your High School Reunion (or better yet, your prom?) Hit up the mailbag at ramble_on@comcast.net


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