DUCKFIGHTER ILLUSTRATED

<B>IN THIS ISSUE:</B><ul> <li>Season enters final month<br> <li>Ducks flying north to face Wounded Dawgs<br> <li>Beavers robbed by officials<br> <li>Tribute to Troy <li>Bruins still quietly stalking title</ul>


Revived Ducks vow payback; Dawgs need to put Troy behind them
Race Bannon with Mallard N. Moore

Mallard N. Moore - The Oregon Ducks are flying high again after a rousing win over their long time nemesis, Stanford. The mighty Duck defense came up with their first shut out since Hoover was President. The dormant running game sprang back to life behind Terrance Whitehead. The two headed quarterback monster was flawless, as both Clarence Clemmons and Jason Fife were sparkling on Saturday. It is all coming together just in time for the big revenge game this coming Saturday night at Husky Stadium.

The Ducks have won two out the last three games at Husky Stadium, and three total at Husky Stadium since the Nixon Administration. They beat the dearly departed Lambo twice, while losing to long time Duckmaster and basketball prognosticator, Rick Neuheisel. Many Duck fans are chortling that in Lambo II, the Huskies still do not get to win. They are anxious to hear about how the Ducks have suddenly become more talented than a team that beat them 42-14 at Autzen last year.

Race Bannon rebuttal - Well Mallard, that kind of an attitude will not get you invited on the Husky Honks show, where it is well known that the Huskies are 8 years away from being competitive again against major programs like Nevada or Oregon.

I kid you, of course, and need I remind you of last year's talk about the death of the Huskies, and their overrated ness by the talkative free safety of the Ducks? The Huskies will not be caught napping and can insert some joy into the gloom with a big win over the Ducks.

It will be a beat up pack of Dawgs that welcomes the Ducks to hunting season Saturday night. Charles Fredrick is now hurt, which will allow the Ducks to do something they did not bother to do last year, cover Reggie Williams. They might hold him under 200 yards. Kenny James showed some spark, but the Huskies should abandon the running game by halftime, as they have all year. Look for lots of 5 receiver sets as the brain trust tries to get Cody hospitalized once and for all.

MNM - Gosh Race, you sound a little bitter this week. You never were a very good loser. You are not a very good winner for that matter. You are pretty much a rotten person period. The Ducks have passed the Huskies by and not on their way to the basement either. Five out of eight! Kenny Wheaton is going to score!

RB - Mallard, what you do not know is that any Husky fan who lived through the mid 60's to the mid 70's is like a person who lived through the Great Depression. The depression era folks were obsessed about saving money. Husky fans are obsessed about not falling so far behind SC again that we lose 10 straight games to them, and never even sniff the scent of a Rose. Back to back blow outs to SC make us question everything. So the moral of this illustration is that I am in the Great Depression right now.

I see four winnable games ahead for the Purple and Gold and I believe in our players. If our wounded troops can rally behind inspired leadership, we can start to turn this thing around. The youngsters must answer the call; there are no more rookies at game 9. The bruised and battered Huskies, who are missing dozens of starters, will be heavy underdogs against the rich, handsome, highly rated, elite, and sharply attired Oregon Duck squad. The defeaters of Michigan, the cover boys of the other illustrated sports magazine, the plaything of Phil Knight, the deifiers of the NCAA, the Seattle Bowl runners up, and a team the Huskies have to beat.

At this time, the Northwest Championship looks like a worthy goal once again, and the Huskies can all but wrap it up with a win over Oregon, leaving only the annual Apple Cup win to make it official.

The real question is, will a second straight Northwest Championship be enough to make everyone forget about Dr. Feelgood, the memo, the NCAA pool, and save an embattled Athletic Director's job? Maybe.

Point – Counterpoint: Picking the UO-UW game

MNM: The Oregon Ducks have vowed revenge for last years humiliating home defeat. The score was 42-14 and Ricky and his boys celebrated on the Duck field for a good 20 minutes, proving how big of a win it was for the Maryland's favorite bookie. No, it's not a rivalry, not at all. Taking a page from the Rick Neuheisel coaching manual, Mike Bellotti had his team lose three games in a row earlier this season to make the Huskies overconfident. The wily Iron Mike brought the team back with a big win over Stanford as the final piece of the puzzle. You will pay for dancing on the Zero at newly remodeled but no longer feared Autzen Arena.

RB: Mallard, you ignorant slut, you were getting paid back last year for your towel boy giving the choke sign in 1995, not to mention the infamous trashing of the tunnel. The Huskies have won two out of three in this series, as well as two out of three all time. We own your mottled ass and don't forget it bird brain.

MNM: I think you meant to say fowl brain, dog breath. UO has the defensive line to hound Cody (hound Cody, get it?) and make for a long night. The whole world knows that the only receiver he looks at is Reggie, and we can cover him if we use all four of our defensive backs. The Ducks can also stuff the run, not that you people ever run the ball anyway. Bellotti's genius at halftime adjustments will be unchallenged by the Husky staff. This has rout written all over it. – UO – 42, UW – 14

RB: Gosh, that was original Mallard, are you sure you want the last thing that you write for this magazine to be so lame? I KNOW that the Huskies have more talent than UO. Most of it is injured, but we will show the flag and fight to the death anyway. That is just at the tailgater before the game. This is a must win game for the Huskies, meaning that they must win it. – UW – 31, UO – 28
Tribute to Troy
Troy "Cubby" Wadsworth III

The USC Trojans played a game Saturday at Husky Stadium which made the entire Trojan Nation proud. Husky Stadium was once known as the place where Trojans went to die. Now it is known as the Trojans House.

While most of the locals were dazzled by the speed and power of the skill players, it was the dominance along the line of scrimmage that made this game less challenging than a scrimmage at SC practice. Troy is re loaded and ready to dominate for years to come. As long as the winningest program in the Pac 10 the last 30 years continues to flounder, that would be UW, the Trojans have a clear road to dominance. Although the other story in LA, the league leading UCLA Bruins might beg to differ. The Bruins knocked off ASU Saturday night in another quiet, yet non-descript victory. The Bruins are 4-0 in league, ready to set up the LA Championship as the game for the Roses once again.

The Men of Troy look forward to a breather after a tough stretch against Washington and Notre Dame. The struggling Cougars bring their about-to-burst bubble down to LA so the Trojans can exact their revenge in front of the home crowd.

Pete Carroll knows he cannot afford another loss to a weak team. The Cougars barely survived a Beaver team at home that UW killed in Corvallis the week before. Only some questionable officials' calls allowed the Cougs to survive. Even Bob Robertson and Jim Walden thought the officiating was terrible . . . of course, they always think it's terrible. And it's always against "us", according to Walden. What a treasure trove of color commentary that man is. He's the only guy I can think of that might make fans actually miss Paul "where is the flag?" Sorensen's commentary.

Anyway, the Nevada Gaming Commission has launched an inquiry into the last second safety called by WSU, which made winners of anyone who bet the Beavers. Not that we encourage betting on college sports, but one has to wonder if Bill Doba spent anytime at Rick's Montlake Casino.

USC – 45, WSU – 17
Around the world: Cal is now the best darn 4-5 team in America after beating Arizona...Missouri walloped Texas Tech behind 291 rushing yards by their very mobile quarterback...Pinkel is now 6-2...Rainier Beach remains unbeaten, as do the Olympia Bears...Tennessee and Bama played a 5 OT classic, showing that Bama did not need OT loser specialist Mike Price after all...Tennessee won...Miami takes on Virginia Tech this week in a game that will have all Trojans rooting for the Gobblers...If SC doesn't land the Sugar, they will kill Ohio State in the Rose...Notre Dame lost again...Yawn...the Huskies cannot get to South Bend fast enough for Irish fans...Michigan beat Purdue setting up the other half of the traditional Rose Bowl qualifier when they host Ohio State...Jim Owens was honored at Husky Stadium Saturday...somehow it seemed appropriate...Buck up fans, we have work to do still – see you at the Stadium for a little Duck Hunt.

We welcome our Eugene affiliate, eDuck.com to the big Dawgman.com tailgater. The nation's largest and most respected Husky on-line website (are there any other UW sites, I mean with actual traffic?) hosts the nation's most well-known Duck website and their fans. WOW. Be sure to drink a lot, because one set of fans is going home unhappy...and the Husky fans are going home happy.

As always, thanks for reading this tripe, and

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