Washington versus Southern Cal for the Roses
Race Bannon with Troy "Cubby" Wadsworth III
"That's Snoop D-O double G Dogg, dog," said USC recruiting coordinator Calvin Broadus as he peeled several Benjamins off his roll and tipped the 6 foot 5 inch, 250 pound high school student who served him his happy meal. "There's more where that came from if you get that 40 time down."
At that point Pete Carroll rolled up in his custom 64 Impala, hitting his juice and putting away his "Girls Gone Wild" DVD as he prepared to go over the latest group of future all pros with his top recruiter.
"We've got to find a place for Garrett to live now that Matt has graduated," pointed out Carroll as he had his homies clear out the usual booth so he and Calvin could discuss the matters of the day.
"No problem my man," said the easy going Broadus as he wondered once again how long this program out of control would be able to keep this shizzle up. "The Girls Next Door adopted him and now he hangs at my man Hef's mansion. Hef always wanted a son."
Just another day in the life of So Cal's favorite reality show, USC Football.
The unbeaten Trojans survived a case of severe boredom and got past the morally defeated WSU Cougars at Martin P. Vandal Stadium in Pullman. This could be bad news for the Huskies, as the Trojans will spend the week hearing about how disgusting it was to not cover the spread against a Pac 10 bottom feeder. There is little chance that the suddenly revived Huskies can sneak up on the Trojans next Saturday at the venerable Los Angeles Mausoleum.
The Trojans have won 57 Pac 10 games in a row, 84 home games in a row and 78 out of their last 80- games overall. Or so it seems.
"We feel that our fine young student athlete young men can compete and if they take care of the bizzle they will be feeling the shizzle, dog," commented Washington coach Tyrone Willingham as he basked in the glow of the teams third straight win and 4-1 record overall after dismantling the Wrong Stoops with 6 minutes of offense Saturday night.
DFI legend Isaiah Stanback continues to work with opposing defenses who want him to beat them deep with his passing arm. The agreeable Stanback torched Arizona for 244 yards in the first half alone and led three scoring drives in the 2nd quarter which proved to be enough to win the game as the amazing, magical Husky Defense continues to thrill and amaze Husky fans who thought defense had gone the way of the dodo bird and had become extinct.
Apparently some Pac 10 defensive coordinators are no brighter than the internet half brains who wanted to move Stanback to wide out.
Cubby writes: You'll find no such foolishness from the USC coaching staff. The Trojan defense is fast and has shut down Stanback twice; including Stanback's first ever start two years ago at the Coliseum. They will contain him, stuff the run, and cover the Beverly Hills Flash, Sonny Shackelford, like a blanket. It's going to take more than 6 minutes of offense, or one half of ball. It takes 60 minutes and the Huskies have yet to come close to a full game this year.
Race adds: I hope they can cover better than they did against those wide open Cougar wide outs and if ‘Season on the Brink' can scramble and buy time, then look out for the Legend. Sure the Huskies need to improve, but USC will have their full attention if they can avoid looking ahead to the Oregon State game, so I expect the best effort of the year, by far. This SC team is good, but mortal.
Cubby continues: Let me know if you see any flying pigs and I'll worry about Washington winning this game. This is for first place in the Pac 10 and USC will take it very seriously and look to break out and really pour one on. I'd like to make the pick right now; but I am just a pawn in Race's world.
Race sums up: Pete Carroll is a big reason why Tyrone Willingham lives in Seattle instead of South Bend. While that is a huge upgrade in lifestyle, the pride factor remains and Willingham would like nothing better than to take the lead in the Rose Bowl race at the expense of his tormentor. It's our job to feel the magic before it happens and this season feels like magic about to happen.
That's right, we just drank a glass of Coach Baird's Purple Kool Aide and we're calling for the miracle, shocker, upset of this century, or any other century. The Whammy in Miami will take second place to the Southland Shocker as the Purple Gang rides again:
PREDICTION: UW 33, USC 31
Spawn Bowl features Pac 10 co leaders
Mallard N. Moore
In what can only be considered the consolation match up, the other two leaders of the Pac 10 meet at Marion Jane Stadium in Bezerkley in an elimination game for the Pac 10 lead.
Alpha spawn Jeff "Pappy" Tedford and Oregon Coach Robert "Mike" Bellotti, who spawned Tedford in the first place, renew their rivalry that finds the master holding sway over the student spawn more often than not.
Former spawn Dirk "Cookie" Koetter was stripped of his rank after a second consecutive blow out loss, this to Bellotti following one from Tedford. Only head coaches can be spawn and Koetter is well on his way to making someone a very good offensive coordinator next season.
The Ducks looked shockingly good as they tore up the Stunned Devils in Tempe. Jonathon Stewart made the most of the 12 carries he stayed healthy for, and Dennis Dixon continues to find wide open receivers in the Duck's spread offense, brought in last year by future spawn, Gary Crowton. Crowton may be the front runner for the ASU job. Just something for recruits to keep in mind.
Meanwhile, Pappy Tedford snuck back into Oregon and slapped around the Beavers in a bit of payback. Next up is payback for a sloppy loss last year in Eugene.
Forget about Tennessee, this Cal team is big up front, loves to run the ball, and then kills you with top tier wide outs and the fast improving Nate Longshoreman at quarterback.
This will be a mirror image game of two programs now fearful of the Husky revival, as they attempt to win the Pac 10 before Willingham gets his own players at Washington.
"We're not even thinking of Washington" scoffed Bellotti as he thought of Washington and wondered how such a talent less team could be 4-1 and tied with him for the Pac 10 lead. "We have bigger fish to fry and it will take all of our focus just to beat Cal, which we fully intend to do. A couple of years ago we had a losing record and some suggested that Pappy Tedford should replace me. We have found those people and eliminated them but the hurt still lingers."
Meanwhile Phil Knight quietly made dinner reservations for two in San Francisco for after the game, just in case. He could always say they were for Bellotti if anyone found out.
Bill Moos remained under house arrest for his sloppy handling of the replay fix during the Oklahoma game. Moos knows his days are numbered if the Ducks' crazy schemes like tickets for rent, forged LOIs, or fixed games keep getting publicized. Nike money can only buy so much, and with Oregon always in the news, it stops Knight from buying probation for USC. It is all he can do to keep UO off probation.
Moos once again cursed Todd Turner as he envied him at the same time. He knows his days are numbered at UO.
PREDICTION: California 35, Oregon 31
The Rest: Ohio State and Michigan continue to roll towards an epic match up…Urban Legend led Florida past Alabama…Gary Pinkle is 5-0 and Mizzou beat winless Colorado…Dan Hawkins is out of eastern philosophies and his now considering Scientology and Tom Cruise as a way to reach his team…Buff fans blame Barney who in turn blames Neuheisel…Mike Reilly at OSU is in deep trouble as they await the WSU Cougars…Meanwhile in Idaho, Dennis Erickson….FireRonZook.com now has a redirect link to FireJohnLSmith.com after the Illini beat Michigan State….Texas and Oklahoma renew hostilities in the biggest game outside of LA next week…no word on who will man the replay booth...Damn, we're 4-1 kids…Winning is Cool!
Heaven help the foes of Washington, but not too much…Thanks for reading – Race
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