Luke's Power Rankings

Two weeks into the season, and's Luke Lapinski is already at mid-season form. Check out which team he's got at the top in this week's Power Rankings.

1.  HOUSTON – Putting their league best 90 runs to good use.

2.  FLORIDA – Giving up a ridiculous 2.16 runs per game.

3.  OAKLAND - Jim Mecir leads the AL in holds with 4. That's the kind of stat you're just not going to get anywhere else.

4.  LOS ANGELES - Wait, Jose Lima's here now?  What, is it just Lima time everywhere?

5.  MINNESOTA - If everyone's hurt, do they just play out the rest of the season with replacement players? You know, like the Expos?

6.  BOSTON - Yeah! Way to win a series from the Yankees when it really doesn't matter!

7.  ANAHEIM - Off to a powerful start. Does that mean Eckstein's on steroids?

8.  CHI. WHITE SOX - Back-to-back wins in their last at bat has made them exciting at least.

9.  ATLANTA - Whatever happened to Mike Hampton? (0-1, 8.56 ERA)

11.  BALTIMORE - Quietly sitting atop the highly touted AL East. Not for long, but they are right now.

12. NY YANKEES - One more loss and everyone's fired.

13.  CINCINNATI - Adam Dunn's hitting .400. Adam Dunn! That's like twice his average from last year!

13.  CHI. CUBS - Uh, yeah. If Prior's done for the year, we'll see you in 2005. Blame Bartman.

14.  PHILADELPHIA - Well, time to rebuild the Vet.

15.  DETROIT - How do you account for the Tigers' miraculous run to the top of the AL Central? It's two weeks into the season, that's how.

16.  PITTSBURGH - Believe it or not, Raul Mondesi is in a court case against a guy who claims to have helped Mondesi get better over the last couple years. And Mondesi isn't the one filing charges!

17.  SAN DIEGO - Look out Padres, PETA is mad at you. No team that has angered PETA has ever gone on to win the World Series that year.

18.  ST LOUIS - Two words to solve all of your pitching problems: (1) Rick (2) Ankiel.

19.  SAN FRANCISCO - Marquis Grissom hits two home runs in one game - two! - and all anyone can talk about is this Bonds character.

20.  SEATTLE - Don't worry. Constantly losing to your division rivals doesn't matter that much anyway. Unless you're trying to make the playoffs or something.

21.  TEXAS - Everything's bigger in Texas. That includes R.A. Dickey's ERA (6.94).

22.  TAMPA BAY - Victor Zambrano already has 3 wins. Yes, that does scare me.

23.  COLORADO - Maybe if baseball switched over to the BCS, they'd be ranked No. 1.

24.  MILWAUKEE - Well, their 6 wins have exceeded my expectations for the year.

25.  NY METS - It concerns me that you would even want to read anything about the Mets.

26.  ARIZONA - Shhh. Roberto Alomar's trying to sleep. Or else trying to bat - I can't tell the difference anymore.

27.  TORONTO -  And your hats are stupid looking too.

28.  KANSAS CITY - Losing 6 in a row just won't get in done in this division.  Ok, yeah it will.

29.  CLEVELAND - (David) Riske Business: 5 innings pitched, 2 blown saves (but he's whittled the ERA down to 12.60). Is it really a risk if you know what's going to happen?

30.  MONTREAL -  They aren't that bad at baseball. If you replace "that bad" with "good".  And "baseball" with "anything."

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