The Phillies Could Be An Impressive TV Network

With the new television season right around the corner, the Phillies have put together their own schedule of shows designed to keep fans entertained. Some of the shows have already played out, some will play out over the final nine games of the season and some premier during the offseason. Sit back and enjoy our preview of PTV – Phillies Television.

What television network these days would get any notice without a reality show or two? PTV is no different.

Survivor: The Bullpen - With pending free agencies and players with pricey contract options hanging over the Phillies, which members of the Phillies bullpen will be voted out and which will stay. An even money bet for the first to go is Jose Mesa.

Big Brother - The Phillies install cameras all over the clubhouse to watch the players and coaches interact with each other. See how the blonde brigade alliance survives since Head of Household Ed Wade voted Tyler Houston out of the house. Keep an eye out for players to leave of their own accord – Kevin Millwood – even though there's no way they would ever be voted out.

The Bachelor - Leslie Gudel throws more and more softball questions at Pat Burrell, while making googlie eyes at him through the entire interview.

With all of that reality, we need a laugh or two don't we? Don't worry. PTV has a nice lineup of comedies for us.

Friends - A bunch of friends all get together to dye their hair blonde thinking it will turn around the future of the club. The funny thing is that it may be part of the solution to what was ailing the Phillies.

Grumpy Old Men - A TV version of the popular film, stars Larry Bowa, John Vukovich and Joe Kerrigan as three grumpy old men, who are constantly antagonized by their young employees. It all turns very funny when interpreter Ramon Henderson confuses the conversation between Bowa, Kerrigan and pitcher Vicente Padilla and tells Padilla to throw as many fastballs as he wants.

ER: The Comedy - That's right folks, a comedy version of the dramatic favorite. In this version, Ed Wade scours emergency rooms all over baseball looking for pitchers with arm problems to fill holes in the Phillies bullpen. Will Mike Jackson make a cameo appearance next spring?

I don't know about you, but I love a good dramatic series. PTV has some that are sure to tingle the spine.

Without A Trace - Detective Joe Kerrigan searches for Jose Mesa's missing fastball and finally gives up, realizing that it's a lost cause.

CSI: Philadelphia - Detective Greg Gross looks for clues as to why Pat Burrell had a .192 batting average at the all-star break. In a season ending cliff hanger, will Gross' bosses decide that he didn't handle the case well enough and fire him?

The Practice - A basketball drama about a star player – Allen Iverson – who talks a lot about the importance of practice, but mysteriously disappears when practice time rolls around. (Okay, it has nothing to do with the Phillies, but it was too easy to resist.)

Third Watch - Larry Bowa returns for his third season as manager of the Phillies. Or does he?

PTV has some shows for the do-it-yourselfer enthusiasts, as well.

This Old House - Watch as the Phillies hire completely inexperienced do-it-yourselfers who work cheap, led by Bob Vila to implode Veterans Stadium.

Cooking With Krukker - At season's end, chef John Kruk shows interesting dishes that can be prepared from scraps of food that he's found lying around The Vet after games.

And finally, for daytime viewers, a couple of very nice viewing options.

The Young and the Restless - Young Phillies players Geoff Geary, Ryan Madson and Jason Michaels fight for playing time amongst a team full of older, veteran players.

Dr. Phil - This of course, is an established show, but on the upcoming season, Dr. Phil spends the entire season working to straighten out the dysfunctions of the Phillies front office. Eventually, Ed Wade is cured of his habit of making bad trades or doing nothing at all and finally makes a good, meaningful trade after Dr.Phil asks him for the 1,000th time "how's that workin' for ya?"

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