DONUT 1: NOBODY picked the Dallas Mavericks to win in the first round, says Mark Cuban. EVERYBODY was against us, says the Mavs owner.
"Everybody thinks we didn't have what it takes," says Cuban. "Everybody was a prognosticator. Everybody was wrong. ..."
Easy, there, big fella. "Nobody'' and "everybody'' are large words.
If this is a stab at being intentionally hyperbolic in order to make fun of media "experts'' who didn't forecast Dallas to advance to Round 2, I'm for it.
If this is some sort of front-office attempt to create an "Us-Against-Them'' movement, give it up. It's transparent and inaccurate.
Now, if Cuban and the Mavs want to claim that NOBODY gives them a chance against LA, that might have some traction. ...
DONUT 2: Dirk Nowitzki is now 10-7 in potential series-clinching games, averaging 26.2 points per game in those outings.
In the Portland series, here's how he rolled, game-by-game, in scoring: 28, 33, 25, 20, 25, and 33.
My UberMan. I think I'll keep him.
DONUT 3: This now becomes an argument not only for another day, but, with the Blazers gone fishin', an argument for another year:
Was Dallas right to believe Gerald Wallace has too many offensive limitations to trade for him, or not?
"Crash'' did very little for five games. Looked lost in the halfcourt, especially. Ah, but the want-to: In an elimination game, he scored 13 points in the first, missed the second with a bad back, and then came back to total 32, with 12 boards.
He's not an iso wing, I still don't think. And he only did what he did once. Oh, and his team is out of it, right?
Does Dallas need a player exactly like that? It's now a discussion for another year.
DONUT 4: The Lakers' Ron Artest, seven years removed from the Malice at the Palace, is given the NBA Citizenship Award.
The Lakers' Derrick Caracter? I guess his trophy is only seven years away!
DONUT 5: Go Mavs ... and Go Premium!
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DONUT 6: I get a charge out of the NBA playoffs. The NFL does it for me, too.
I'm not saying baseball is boring, but is MLB's entire marketing campaign really all about one player's facial hair?
DONUT 7: Good to see the judge allow NFL players to go to their teams' facilities and practice in May ... the same exact thing the same exact players will be griping about being forced to do in July.
DONUT 8: As much sports as I watch on TV, I'm ready to now answer the question:
No, Dodge Durango, I haven't been wondering what you were up to.
DONUT 9: In Tennessee, teachers might no longer be allowed to say the word "gay.''
According to authorities, "Fruity,'' "light-loafered'' and "Richard Simmons'' will still be allowed.
DONUT 10: NBA Draft talk: So the NBA has received 89 early entries ... for 60 NBA draft spots.
Um ... maybe instead of being an "early entry'' into the draft, son, you should take just one more math class ...
DONUT 11: Hey, if you want to stay in touch with the Mavs at every moment ...
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DONUT 12: To answer your question ... Yes.
On July 14, 2010, the Mavericks swapped out Eddie Najera's contract, Matty Carroll's contract and The DUST Chip for Tyson Chandler.
It wasn't LeBron. It wasn't a grand-slam home run. I termed it, at the time, a ground-rule double.
And you? You said The DUST Chip was a Bust Chip. And you snickered at our David Lord's discovery of Damp's unusual contract and you snickered at all the Mavs believers who purchased "The Dust Chip'' t-shirts.
Today, they are not "The Same Ol' Mavs.'' They are in the second round, about to embark on what will be a wildly popular (and hopefully wildly contested) series with the Lakers.
Tyson Chandler -- and The DUST Chip -- are big reasons why.
To answer your question ... Yes.
Out in the garage, I've still got a couple of "The DUST Chip'' t-shirts, if you want one.
DONUT 13: A No. 8 seed beat a No. 1 seed last night. This happened to happen to Dallas' archrival. Which gave my FishSports Twitter something to do ... especially following the comments from the likes of Jeff Van Gundy and Michael Wilbon.
Wilbon: This is "not a case of a No. 1 seed losing or embarrassing itself. ... The Spurs (gave) considerable effort ...''
Van Gundy: "I don't think the Spurs have anything to be ashamed of.''
So NOW a 1 losing to an 8 is a non-story, justifiable if the 1 "gave effort,'' is "nothing to be ashamed of'' and in a sense isn't really even "a case of a No. 1 seed losing''?
How is losing not a "case of losing''?
Again, it's a relief to know the rules of postseaosn embarrassment have suddenly changed. Now, it doesn't really feel like a big deal that Dallas lost a 23-point lead in Portland, lost as a 1-vs.-8 to Golden State, or lost a 2-and-7/8-game lead in Miami.
Because they "gave effort,'' or whatever.