Mavs Donuts: Marion Planking, Dirk And Nike

What did Ian Mahinmi do to Kobe? How are the Mavs like 'Star Wars'? Will fan love influence Tyson Chandler? What's Mike Modano's role in hockey now? Just when I wanted to go 'planking,' Shawn Marion informs me it ain't cool anymore?! And Dirk's relationship with Nike - or vice-versa. Welcome to Weekend Donuts!

DONUT 1: Far be it from me to rain on the "Dirk-doesn't-do-endorsements'' parade. It's a storyline that reinforces the truth about his order of priorities and lack of greed. One angle is discussed here on Boards.

The UberMan does have his priorities in order and does harbor a lack of greed.


But people who keep repeating the same stuff over and over haven't stopped to check in with, oh, say, Nike.

A source close to Dirk tells me that Nike is getting ready to pump him up, big-time, as part of their eventual 2011-12 basketball push.

Trust me. You will see more of Dirk. Nike will make sure of it. It'll be done in a way that allows for The UberMan to have his priorities in order and to harbor a lack of greed. But it will be done.

DONUT 2: Yes. Ian Mahinmi has just triggered World War III between the World Champion Dallas Mavericks and Kobe the Los Angeles Lakers.

Yes. That's exactly it.

Dallas' third-string center Mahinmi is being quoted as sayinf that "Kobe is super arrogant but everybody loves him,' Mahinmi said. 'To me, Kobe is more arrogant (than LeBron James).''

The media reaction? To quote one outlet: "Something tells me those comments will be relayed to Bryant between now and the end of the lockout. And it will just make that first game between the Lakers and Mavericks that much more intriguing and highly anticipated once it ends."

May I serve as a voice of reason here?

DONUT 3: Yes, I may.

a) The Ianimal wouldn't know how to an incendiary remark if one bit him on the ass. His personality doesn't allow it.

b) The language barrier almost certainly guided Ian into answering a question this way; I promise you he didn't initiate the conversation about 'Who is the NBA's most arrogant player.'

c) Kobe needs inspiration from an opponent's third-string center? The Drama Queen has slipped that much?

d) Last time I looked, Dallas was dismantling the Lakers. Piece by piece. Player by player. A doxen hearts pulled from a dozen chests.

The Mavs have no reason to worry about LA at this moment. And LA is still waking up in the middle of its sleep with Mavs-related nightmares.

DONUT 4: A short answer to the question I've heard posed from at least one media outlet and a group of readers, too: Can Mavs fans influence Tyson Chandler into staying?

OK. Ready for the short answer?


DONUT 5: The boys at Yahoo are already putting the retiring Yao Ming into the Basketball Hall of Fame.

No offense intended toward the injury-plagued Rocket, but ... what's he done better than anybody else besides being tall?

Seriously, I recognize what Yao means symbolically regarding the globalization of the game. But only in the wacky world of the HOF selection process can Yao suddenly vaulted over dozens of viable candidates whose accomplishments exceed symbolism.


DONUT 6: I communicated with Shawn Marion this week about "planking,'' which as near as I can tell entails 'Trix laying his body down in various places (atop mailboxes and poker tables) and stretching out stiff. Like a plank, I guess.

"I'm not doing it anymore,'' 'Trix tells me. "Yeah, I'm over it. It was just a few days of fun.''

Like I told Marion, this is what sucks about being my age: Right exactly at the moment I catch onto a trend, the trend is passe.

DONUT 7: Have you checked out the Mavs Store? Which will it be? 'YES. WE. DID'? 'Take That Championship Wit Chew'? Or 'The UberMan'?

DONUT 8: I visited with old roomie Mike Modano this week, and he tells me that whichever group ends up buying the Stars (he doesn't know much about the Greenberg bid, by the way), he stands to be invited to join up with the winning group.

Mo's role will have less to do with hockey than with the corporate side of things. There are relationships to be repaired. My impression is that Modano -- prepared to retire from the ice after a season in Detroit -- will be the face of that movement in Dallas.

DONUT 9: Want MORE Mavs? Sign on up! It's about a dime-a-day for the very best in Mavs coverage from And yes, we keep it rolling all summer long ... You won't get 'em covered like you get 'em covered here! Go Mavs and Go Premium!

DONUT 10: Weirdest Mavs Tweet O' The Week comes from Tyson Chandler:

"I just saw Prince William & Princess Kate!!''

DONUT 11: I wondered the other day why ESPN's John Trollinger insists on calling Barea "Jub Jub.''

Reader Brian T offers an answer:


I've read everything of yours online for like 6 yrs. 'Preciate the mavs scoops! You've undoubtedly heard this jub jub explanation possibility by now, but in case you haven't, here's my idea:

It sounds like a quote from an ewok in Star Wars, Return of the Jedi. The cute little Ewok "jub jub's" (or, kinda "yub yub") at Princess Leia after she awakes on the forest floor of Endor (a fictional moon, I think.) The connections between our beloved "Bar-rera" and Ewoks include the two J's from the "jub jub" movie line(s), and the short stature of both.

Keep up the fine work, Brian Thomas


DONUT 12: Is that it? Hollinger is saying Barea is an Ewok? Not very nice coming from a man who is the Jar-Jar Binks of Mavs coverage.

Pop into The Mavs Store! The 'TAKE THAT CHAMPIONSHIP WIT CHEW!' shirt is hot!

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