Friday Donuts: 'Hoodwinked And Bamboozled'

Do You Feel 'Tricked, Duped, Hoodwinked And Bamboozled'? Let Friday Morning Mavs Donuts cure what ails you!

DONUT 1: The NFL may be closing in on a deal. ... which leads some feet-draggers to wonder if they are truly getting their full share of the $9 billion pie.

I give you Redskins player rep Vonnie Holliday via Twitter: "The truth of the matter is we got tricked, duped, led astray, hoodwinked, bamboozled! & I'm sorry you did too!"

Vonnie, Vonnie, Vonnie. You really think "we'' (football fans and Twitter followers) feel "bamboozled and hoodwinked''? We just want our football. Now get out there, keep your head on a swivel, and please invest your share of the $9 billion wisely.


DONUT 2: Out at Grapevine Mills, Dirk is a Lego. I cannot tell for sure whether the image alongside Dirk is The Real Coop or a Lego Coop. That's how crafty those Legos are!

DONUT 3: In case you missed it: We cut through the B.S. from media and fans regarding Dallas' supposed need for a backup 4 in this examination of who might be available and what Mavs brass thinks of them. A Premium exclusive.

DONUT 4: Hey, are you gearing up to get involved in the North Texas $100,000 Smile Giveaway? You might want to get on that by going to my family dentist ...! Please check out Dr. B and his staff. They've been friends and supporters all the way back to the Fish For Lunch days. And they truly are the best in the field of family dentistry.

DONUT 5: Steve Nash wins a parking spot.

DONUT 6: Maybe that's why Andrew Byrum has to park in handicap spots. Nash is hogging all the regular parking places.

DONUT 7: Have you checked out the Mavs Store? Which will it be? 'YES. WE. DID'? 'Take That Championship Wit Chew'? Or 'The UberMan'? Oh, and have you noticed the radio-show-related Easter Egg in our mall yet?

DONUT 8: According to my Spanglish, J.J. Barea and Ms. Universe are preggers. Well, she's preggers. He's in charge of the cigars and the 529.

DONUT 9: Want MORE Mavs? Sign on up! It's about a dime-a-day for the very best in Mavs coverage from And yes, we keep it rolling all summer long ... You won't get 'em covered like you get 'em covered here! Go Mavs and Go Premium!

DONUT 10: That Turkish team is claiming to have engaged in "talks with Kobe.'' But read between the lines. Nobody's actually "talked to Kobe.'' Ergin Ataman, the coach of the Turkish team Besiktas (which really has signed Deron Williams, though even he's a long way from actually getting on that plane), keeps making noises about having visited with Kobe's people ... and we keep writing about it ... but of course, The Drama Queen is surrounded by a phalanx of "people.'' Talking with a Kobe aide, PR guy or fluffer ISN'T the same as talking to Kobe.

I'll say it again: The players association is attempting to stir the pot by orchestrating the appearance of a threat of a migration overseas. And then along comes Ergin Ataman, the coach of the Turkish team Besiktas ... he's a godsend. He's doing their PR work for them. The players association barely needs to dirty its hands.

DONUT 11: Being a Premium Subscriber comes with certain privileges. Like, once in awhile Dirk Nowitzki signs a Panini trading card for me to give to you. Or we give out a $25 giftcard from a sponsor.

So ... today, in our continuation of's Summer Swag ... Travis B, you are a Premium Mavs Fan. So, Travis B, you win an UberMan shirt from the Store!

DONUT 12: Colts boss Jim Irsay, on preparation for the Indy Super Bowl: "We've got our snowplows ready and our seats counted."


That's obviously a shot at Jerry Jones, the Cowboys and all of North Texas ... and it's bad karma. Mr. Irsay, I've covered a riot during a Miami Super Bowl and an earthquake during a Bay Area World Series and now the most crippling winter storm in Texas history ... shit happens, and it seems just when you think you are the smartest guy in the room, shit happens to you. Count your seats and your snowplows ... crack your jokes ... and then pray to God that the president of the Indianapolis Colts is such a powerful man that he can, for at least a week in February, rule the world and its weather and its citizens.

Pop into The Mavs Store! The 'TAKE THAT CHAMPIONSHIP WIT CHEW!' shirt is hot!

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