Death Chat 2007: Undercooked Pizza Edition

Another rapid-fire session with the gang, wherein open discord breaks out on items such as the best pick for the Browns and potential draft day trades. Watch the horrifying bloodshed close up on this week's Death Chat 2007...

Fred: I'm here
Barry: We're just missing that Taylor dude.
Barry: Heh... speak of the...
John: Not no more
Rich: Not anymore. Musta heard ya.
John: Ears were ringing
Barry: It's like saying "Beetlejuice"
Rich: We got ourselves a quorum.
Barry: Well, let's kick it.

Barry:
1. The Dolphins appear to be looking in other directions with respect to quarterback, and Trent Green remains available. If he's available for a 5th round pick, should the Browns grab him...
Rich: Chiefs asking a second rounder for him. hehehehe.
Fred: Yes
John: Yes
Rich: Chiefs won't accept a fifth rounder.
Barry: IF they would, Rich... IF....
Rich: That's a mighty big if.
Barry: Don't obfuscate with the facts
Rich: If you're pushing, then yes. But not gonna happen.
John: Chiefs won't get a first-day pick for Green
Fred: I agree with that
Barry: Alright, how high would each of you go for Trent?
Rich: Fifth round. And that's pushing it.
John: No more than a fifth.
Fred: fourth, as long as it isn't Trent Dilfer
Barry: Got it... Palm Beach Post said earlier today that the "Lions and Browns" were starting to look for Green. Believe them?
Fred: no
Rich: No
Rich: At this time of the year, I believe very little of what I hear.
John: A source told me earlier this evening that the story was false, but interest in Green could change if he's still available after the draft.
Rich: Let's not get too excited about Trent Green. He's 36 and on the downside of a career.
John: Exactly Rich
Barry: Who's getting excited? He's a short-term guy and a mentor for whoever is the QB of the future. That's it. We're hoping for a Gary Danielson.
Barry: Anyone expect any more?
Fred: No
John:
Yer cranky tonight, Barry.
Barry: Shut up Taylor.
Barry: I am not.
John: Your honor, I rest my case.
Rich: I don't think he would want too come to Cleveland as a mentor. Unless he wanted to live there.

Barry:
2. Falcons DT Grady Jackson has filed a suit against the Falcons due to the release of medical records and looks to be angling to leave. You all laughed at me when I said "Get Grady" last year. Are you interested in him now?
John: He'd be mentoring Cleo Lemon in Miami.
Rich: Jackson?
Barry: No, the Trentster.
Rich: Quit dangling your participles.
John: Cranky AND confusing tonight.  Nice.
Barry: John, by the time I'm done editing, I will appear brilliant.
John: Yer not gonna get me to look at my zipper, Rich.  Amo not falling for that one again.
Barry: Stop avoiding my Grady question.
John:
Anything that helps the DL I'm all for.
Fred: no
Barry: NO?!? How can you turn down a big fat guy named Grady?
Rich: I'm interested in anyone who can play the defensive line better than that group the Browns had last season.
Fred: It depends on the price
John: Of course.
Barry: Sounds like you're not a Grady Believer, Fred.
Fred: Unless it's Sizemore
Rich: The reason Jackson is suing appears to be HIPAA related.
Barry: That sounds right, Rich... speculation is that he was looking for a better deal or free agency.
(pause)
Barry:
I was just waiting for JT to somehow combine the "dangling participles" and "sizemore".
John: lol

Barry:
3. Let's play create-a-rumor: If you were Phil Savage, would you place a phone call to Chicago to ask about Lance Briggs?
John: No.
Rich: Too late. Dan Snyder reportedly is ready to break the bank for Briggs.
Fred: I wouldn't give up a top 10 pick
Fred: The Browns have too many other needs
Rich: Supposedly, the Bears are mulling over a deal with the Redskins.
Barry: That's true, but it looks like they'll turn it down.
Barry: They gave Briggs another contract offer tonight.
Fred: His agent is lobbying for the trade
Rich: Briggs appears to have shoved hard enough to move the Bears off dead center.
John: Now, if the Browns traded down in the draft, and Briggs were still available, I might consider it.  I wouldn't give up the #3 overall for him.
Barry: So, #3 for #31 and Briggs is not OK, but #7 for #31 and Briggs would be?
John: What part of "might consider it" did you not understand?
Barry: The clock is ticking... the deal is on the table... you've dealt down to #7... would you swap it for Briggs and the #31?
Rich: I wouldn't give up the third pick overall for Briggs, who won't be the same linebacker without Brian Urlacher by his side.
Rich: No way.
Barry: Just getting specific John.
Fred: I wouldn't make the deal
Barry: I think I'd make that deal.
Rich: Urlacher made Briggs. Not the other way around.
John: I would consider it more than I would with the #3 overall.  Also depends on if anyone I was targeting had slid in the draft.
Fred: There are a lot of variables.
Rich: He wouldn't be that good with the Browns.
John: Nobody ever is
Rich: In Chicago, he has a decent DL and Urlacher.
John: A system guy then?
Barry: If I could get Lance Briggs and Aaron Ross/Justin Blalock/Ben Grubbs/etc when I'm done with the first round, I'm a happy guy.
Rich: You hittin' the sauce again, Barry?
Fred: I think he's a product of the system
Barry: Nope. Stone cold sober. Surprisingly.
John: Therein lies the problem.
Barry: Lance Briggs is a stud. A sure thing. You've still got a low first-round pick and whatever you got for trading down from #3 to #7. I'd do that deal.
Rich: The Browns don't need another inside linebacker. What do they do with Leon Williams and D'Qwell Jackson if they get Briggs?
Fred: Half of their salary cap will be at LB
Barry: Stop confusing me with depth chart questions.
Rich: Repeating . . . without Urlacher, Briggs is not that good.
John: I don't think you pass on a player like Briggs just because you have Leon or DQ on the roster.
Rich: You guys are seriously overrating this guy outside the Chicago scheme.
Barry: Move Leon outside. Problem solved.
John: Yes.  Absolutely.
Rich: Then what do you do with Peek and McGinest?
Barry: This is probably the last year McGinest plays football, Rich.
Rich: Think outside the box here, guys.
Fred: Two years ago might have been the last he played football
Barry: Rimshot! for Fred
Barry: Alright, we have a difference of opinion. Dats cool.

Barry: 4. Let's try to get into the cold, heartless soul of AL Davis for a minute. The Raiders have sniffed around the availability of Josh McCown a little... do you think they're trying to figure out a way to rationalize drafting Calvin Johnson?
Fred: It sounds like the Raiders don't know what they'll do. They might draft another Kicker in the first round
John: I'm still not certain Al Davis is alive.  I think animatronics are somehow involved.
Rich: No way. They're gonna keep Randy Moss and draft Russell.
Barry: You really want Randy Moss hanging around the same set of lockers as your impressionable rookie QB?
Fred: nor a rookie wide receiver
Rich: That's the kind of locker room Al Davis likes.
Barry: Well, let's ask this question first, then: Do you think that the Raidahs will find a taker for Moss?
Fred: I see a draft day taker
Rich: Takers pollute the NFL landscape. I don't think anyone will give up what Davis wants.
John: I don't think it will matter if Moss is on the roster or not as to whether CJ is the Raiders' pick.
Barry: Maybe it's just because I love Jamarcus Russell, in a manly way, but I'm looking for any sign they'll pass him up for CJ
Rich: I believe Davis likes a franchise quarterback more than he does a franchise wide receiver.
John: Who's the last franchise QB Davis has picked?
Barry: Follow-up, would the Buccaneers getting Calvin Johnson at #4 be the biggest draft steal in the last five years?
Fred: Very well could be
Rich: Try Shawne Merriman at #12 (if I'm not mistaken) a couple of years ago by San Diego.
Barry: But isn't Merriman a bit suspect at this point?
John: It would be one of, absolutely.  If the scouting reports are correct.
Rich: Davis is still kicking himself for not picking Matt Leinart last year.
Fred: If he takes Johnson it will really make things interesting for the Browns.
Rich: If he takes Johnson, the draft tumbles out of control for the first five or so picks.
Rich:
You asked for a draft steal. I give you Shawne Merriman. He has played more like a top 3 pick.
Barry: Yeah, he's a draft steal, but could CJ at #4 be like MJ at #3?
Barry: (With the Browns and Lions playing the role of Portland Trailblazers)
Rich: No.
John: Nah, not a WR.
Fred: I wouldn't say so right now
Rich: No.
Barry: Alright. I'm sounding like a hyperbolic ESPN commentator now. Someone get me a beer.
Rich: Wide receivers do not control games.
John: If the Browns get the Hakeem of the MJ draft, I'd be happy.
Barry: LOL
Rich: Nice crossover, John.
John: I'm the Tim Hardaway of the group.  I'll break yer ankles.
Barry: You break your own, that's how good you are.
John: lol
Rich: BTW, how're the Cavs doing?
Fred: Losing by one to the Knicks who are missing four guys.
Barry: So, really, the point is that there isn't an MJ in football, is there?

Barry:
5. A recent article by someone I've never heard of on some big corporate sports site said that the Browns have had a bad off-season because they haven't replaced Charlie Frye. If the Browns are starting next season with the same group of quarterbacks, would you consider the off-season a failure?
John: Yes.
Rich: Depends heavily on how Phil Savage drafts.
Fred: I wouldn't call it a failure but it's a disappointment they can't upgrade Dorsey
John: It's a failure if they can't upgrade Frye/DA.
Fred: I agree, but you got to get at least one more guy.
Barry: So, if he does great in the draft, but it's still Frye/DA, that might be OK, Rich?
Rich: I wouldn't consider it a failure if Anderson is the starter and has more to work with.
John: Yep, and if they go into 2007 with the same QBs, it's an abject failure in my book.
Fred: Hey rich, I see your man Kelly is an Eagle
Barry: I just keep remembering how Savage talked about how the Ravens had to trade up to get Boller...
John: They also have a Lombardi.
Rich: If Savage fails to give Anderson help (Adrian Peterson, Adrian Peterson), then I'd call it a failure.
Barry: So, the answers are "yes" from John, and "maybe" from Rich and Fred?
Rich: Maybe.
Fred: yes
John: I could kind of go along with that, Rich.

Barry:
LAST QUESTION BEFORE THE LIGHTNING ROUND...
Barry: 6. If drafting a quarterback could buy you a year of two of breathing space before the team is expected to win... if you're Phil Savage...  does that enter into your calculations?
Fred: No, we've had nine years
Rich: Agreed.
John: If drafting a QB is best for the franchise, then you pull the trigger.
Barry: So, you wouldn't be tempted to buy another year of time to rebuild the team?
Rich: This team needs to starting getting competitive ASAP.
Fred: This year
John: If I can get somebody who I felt was going to be a franchise QB--given the current state of the position--I wouldn't hesitate.
Barry: Because... with as many holes as this team still has... I'd be tempted...
Rich: Not if it meant losing some of your fan base.
Fred: They need to take a QB if they think he's a franchise player

Barry: LIGHTNING ROUND  LIGHTNING ROUND  LIGHTNING ROUND
Barry: 1. The Browns are suddenly in the position that they can pick whoever they want on 4/28. Name your player. No explanations,  equivocations, or obfuscation. Who do you want? Pick.
Fred: Peterson
John: Brady Quinn
Rich: Surprise!!!!! Adrian Peterson.
Rich: And you??
Barry: You're all wrong. The correct answer is Jamarcus Russell.
Rich: Damn
Barry: LOL
John: Barry and Jamarcus, sittin' in a tree...
Barry: Yeah, you're the one who is in love with the cover boy
John: :-)

Barry: 2. Rumor: Browns are considering trading up to get Jamarcus Russell. Is the rumor believable or pure lunacy?
Fred: untrue
John: lunacy
Rich: At this point/ who cares? Let's see where that rumor is on April 27.
Barry: Fred and John get one point. It's lunacy.
John: That answer wasn't very lightning-like, Rich
Rich: Old age.
Barry: LOL...
John: lol

Barry: 3. If the Browns traded Charlie Frye for a draft pick, which round is a fair price?
Rich: If they get a seventh, they should be thrilled.
John: Do they still have a ninth round in the draft?
Fred: Cavs lose to the Knicks!
Barry: Ugh.
John: Aaaarrrggghhhh
Rich: Who cares?
Fred: I wouldn't trade him for a seventh
Barry: You still have to name the round, Fred
Rich: What round?
Barry: What would you trade him for?
Fred: 4-5
Rich: You're dreaming, Fred.
Barry: Fair enough. Fred gets a half-point. The correct answer is "5"
John: LMAO!!!!
Rich: You, too, Barry.
Fred: a 7th rounder isn't going to help you
John: Neither is Charlie. :-)
Rich: LOL
Barry: Zing!
Rich: But that's all you'll be able to get for him.

Barry:
4. EXTRA CREDIT: Jason Kline of the Mansfield News-Journal recently said that the OBR was more reliable than ESPN, FoxSports, and SI.com. Question: Is Jason Kline the most brilliant judge of media quality in history?
John: Yes.
Rich: Is there any question?

(we then return to arguing about Charlie Frye's draft worth)
Fred:
Why trade him then?
Rich: Gotta get something for him.
Fred: He's only played 16 games.
John: I've seen enough, frankly.
Barry: Really, the answer is totally dependent on whether they draft a QB in the first.
Barry: BUT this is lightning round, and logic plays no role here.
Rich: Logic? What's that?
Rich: No one would be stupid enough to give up a five for him.
Barry: Rich, this is a league which has employed Matt Millen for, what, five years?
Barry: Someone's dumb enough.
Rich: The league hasn't employed Millen. The Lions have.
Rich: Not even Millen would be dumb enough to trade a five for Frye.
Barry: Just ask yourself: who is this year's Dwight Clark?
Barry: Find your Dwight, get your fifth.
John: No.  Way.
Barry: Alrighty, then, the Death Chat ends of a note of discord.
Rich: And what better way.
John: You set the tone with your crankiness.
Rich: Me?
John: Barry.
Barry: John Taylor wins with two points for his correct answers on questions 2 and 4.
John: Finally.  There is justice.  I'd like to thank my parents and...
Barry: With that, I'll offer up a cheery "Shut up Taylor!" and we'll be on our way.
John: Nope, he's bitchy tonight.
Barry: My pizza was undercooked. Later!!
Fred: have a good one
John: Later fellas.


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