Taylor's Tales From A Notebook

The game is over, and there was absolutely no gleam. None. John Taylor looked all through his notebook and couldn't find one, or a reason to stay the course with Romeo A. Crennel. No punches pulled. No quarter given.

--Whoever's the last one out, could you please hit the lights and lock the doors?

Thanks in advance.

Cleveland Browns management

--Can somebody please talk to me like a two-year-old child, and explain again exactly why it would be a bad thing to can Romeo A. Crennel before the end of the season? I get what the premise for that line of thinking is: "it could get worse with an interim coach in place." What I don't get, and have to ask is, "Worse, how"? Short of somebody actually dying on the field as a result of a coaching change, I don't get how it could be made worse by doing something you are going to do at the end of the year anyway.

--What, the interim coach will make bad in-game decisions and bizarre personnel moves, look lost and lose?  Yeah, that'd suck to watch week-in and week-out.

--If anything, ending this charade of playing out the string with Romeo A. Crennel on the sidelines would allow the organization to stop the rather inane private dancing they are doing with Bill Cowher. The subterfuge is more embarrassing to the head coach than an actual firing would be.  You are doing the man – and the paying customers – you respect the hell out of  a slap-in-the-face disservice by stringing this out.

--Again, I ask and reiterate in one fell swoop. How much worse can it get if Romeo A. Crennel were fired right here, right now?

--By the way, bitching about whether or not Josh Cribbs got enough snaps under center today is like trying to decide between putting 20- or 22-inch rims on a Yugo. It doesn't matter. IT'S STILL A FRIGGIN' YUGO!

-- Dan Fouts, CBS color man for the game, chiding Romeo A. Crennel for not challenging a call on a Braylon Edwards non-catch in the middle of the fourth quarter: "Somebody's asleep on the sidelines!" Ladies and gentlemen, the head coach of your 2008 Cleveland Browns!!!

--The national embarrassment continues. Thank you, Randy Lerner, for respecting Romeo A. Crennel enough that you don't want to fire him before the end of the season. Boy, that would be embarrassing, eh Randy?

--The Browns have not scored an offensive touchdown since the last play of the third quarter in their win against the Bills on Nov. 17 – today is Dec. 7, by the way. That's a span of 13 straight quarters, or 195 minutes for those who wish to look at it that way.

--The Browns ran 63 plays from scrimmage. By my very rough count, Jerome Harrison was in on 6 of them. His first appearance didn't come until just under twelve minutes remained in the second quarter, and it was his only appearance of a first half that saw Jamal Lewis carry six times for a whopping three yards. Romeo A. Crennel, you are a joke, and a stubborn one at that. Thank God we're at T-minus three games and counting until you are rightfully kicked to the coaching curb.

--Speaking of jokes…

Knock knock…
Who's there?
Clock management…
Clock management who?

The end of the first half was yet another example -- #1,487 for those keeping score at home – as to why Romeo A. Crennel is completely and totally and utterly in over his head on game days.

--And is there any reason why Romeo A. Crennel did not toss the red flag on the third-down catch by Syndric Steptoe with around nine minutes left in the game? Down by 12, the game was close enough and the call was iffy enough to warrant the challenging of the spot.

--And then the non-challenge on the Braylon Edwards' non-catch. (Insert Romeo "DOH!" face here)

--The wife, following the Edwards' non-catch non-review: "Does he think he can redeem his timeouts for a Dairy Queen coupon or something?"

--And then Romeo A. Crennel calls a timeout with 1:53 left in the game, down by 19, and the Titans six yards away from a score. It might be the first time in NFL history that a head coach was trying to run up the score on his own team. It is absolutely stunning how in over his head the soon-to-be ex-head coach is on Sundays. Good man or not, he's a shitty head football coach.

--The wife, after Romeo A. Crennel called the above timeout: "Never mind."

--I can't begin to tell you how envious I am of the Tennessee Titans when I see a shot of Jeff Fisher on their sidelines. Now THAT is a football coach. Damn, it sure would be nice if somebody like that – or Bill Cowher, for example – were available.

--Wasn't it appropriate, given the fact that a Ken Dorsey-led offense was involved in the game, that one of the scoreboards wasn't working?

--Helluva game by D'Qwell Jackson. I still stand by my assertion from earlier in the season, that I would love to see what he could do without Andra Davis next to him.

--Helluva block by Eric Wright on Nick Sorensen early in the first quarter. Too bad they are both members of the Cleveland Browns.

--Third-and-16, and the Titans run a draw. And pick up the first down. You just can't make this stuff up. Hollywood would laugh in your general direction if you came to them with this script. And they're the same people responsible for "Ishtar" and the "Earnest Goes To…" series.

--I've always wondered this: what exactly is wrong with Don Criqui's voice?

--ESPN's Chris Mortensen reported this morning that the Browns have entertained the notion of bringing Marty Schottenheimer back to the sidelines to replace Crennel when he's canned. First, nice "scoop", Mort. Secondly, I would be very much overjoyed if Browns fans received a Gleam underneath their Christmas tree.

--I'm not certain about too many things, but there is one thing I know to be a fact: this team, as it's currently constituted, would not be 4-9 with Cowher or Schottenheimer stalking the sidelines. And there's nothing that anyone could say to convince me otherwise.

--Do the right thing, Randy Lerner. Choose the correct path, Randy Lerner. I know what you want to do, so get it done come hell or high water. Don't take no for an answer from either of your top two choices.

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