A Poor Man's Top 10 List

November 1 - Sandy Penner has compiled a top 10 list of of silliest things people have said to him on his 620 WDAE morning show in the midst of the Bucs 3-3 start.

Quick pop quiz. Multiple choice, of course. To host a radio show like I do on WDAE 620 AM for a living, you must:

A) Have patience
B) Be drunk
C) Have no other appreciable talents
D) All of the above
E)None of the above

You should've answered D, all of the above. Sports fans in general are knee jerk reaction types. Always quick to point out the negative without seeing the whole picture. Sports talk radio is the conduit for those fans. I've always regarded myself as fair, with the ability to analyze without making blanket statements.

Sports fans don't have to be objective because, in essence, they're not held accountable for anything they say. Given all of this information, I've gone out of my way to create a very special Top 10 list.

Just to let you know, I usually detest Top 10 lists and would like to do a Top 10 list of things late night talk show hosts would talk about if Top 10 lists didn't exist.

So, here it is my unvarnished Top 10 silliest things people have said to me in the midst of the Bucs 3-3 start:

10. Tony Dungy doesn't get it.

My response: Actually, Dungy does get it. It's almost too easy to blame the coach when things aren't going the right way.

9. Shaun King should be starting instead of Brad Johnson.

My response: Please stop. If you can't see the upgrade from King to Johnson, you don't deserve to watch football.

8. The Bucs need to run more "trick plays."

My response: The term "trick plays" needs to be modified. Sure, the Bucs should use more variety, but a steady diet of statue of liberty plays and fumblerooskies won't win you games by themselves.

7. Todd Yoder is a non-contributor. My response: How dare anyone say that about a special teams ace like Yoder! Actually, this isn't so silly after all.

6. Mike Alstott is better than Jerome Bettis.

My response: Yes, a caller on my radio show told me this the other morning. Well, besides the carries, yards, touchdowns, and premiere back status, it's probably true.

5. Mike Alstott is another John Riggins.

My response: Yikes.

4. Cosey Coleman makes Ian Beckles look like Randall McDaniel.

My response: Too much for me to figure out. All I know is Coleman and McDaniel are both struggling which are making Buc fans long for the days of Beckles.

3. Aaron Stecker should start instead of Warrick Dunn.

My response: I'm still in the thick of the "should Dunn or Alstott play?" fight. Let's not get crazy here. Stecker has a nice future and some speed, but I'm not ready to replace Dunn yet.

2. Leo Haggerty sounds like Oscar the Grouch from Sesame Street.

My response: WHAT? Snuffalufagus maybe, but not Oscar. Besides, just because a guy's got some green hair and spends a lot of time in a trash can, doesn't make him Oscar the Grouch.

Last, but not least, the No. 1 silliest thing said to me in the midst of the Bucs 3-3 start:

1. The Bucs are not a playoff-caliber squad.

My response: Ask yourself this, what teams in the NFC can you say are without a doubt better than Tampa Bay. The Rams, sure. The Pack, no. The Bears, still not sold. The Eagles, negative. The Vikings, you need medication. The Niners, not yet. Until a lot of these teams prove to me that they're legit power teams, I'm not discounting the Bucs.

Don't forget to tune in next week when I'll have stupid human football tricks and we'll make a shepard's pie with Martha Stewart.

Hardcore with Sandy Penner can be heard every morning Monday - Friday from 6:00 - 8:00 a.m. on WDAE 620 AM.
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