The Buccaneer Stock Exchange

November 7 - In this time of economic strife, all businesses are looking for creative ways to make ends meet. I've lined up the cash cows and with a couple of phone calls created the BSE, that's right The Buccaneer Stock Exchange. You can now buy and sell all things pertaining to the Bucs and make a killing. I'm not charging for my advice and there are no insider trading laws being violated. Bring your checkbook and get ready to be in the money this holiday season.

In this time of economic strife, all businesses are looking for creative ways to make ends meet. Our financial markets are struggling and even the most savvy advisors and investors are feeling the burden. That's why I've taken the liberty of unveiling a sure fire way to make money. I've lined up the cash cows and with a couple of phone calls created the BSE, that's right The Buccaneer Stock Exchange. You can now buy and sell all things pertaining to the Bucs and make a killing. I'm not charging for my advice and there are no insider trading laws being violated. Bring your checkbook and get ready to be in the money this holiday season.

BUY: Brian Kelly - He's done a tremendous job since taking over the starting job. Usually reserves called on to start in the middle of a season take some time to adjust. Not Kelly. He's hitting and being aggressive.

SELL: Donnie Abraham - I'm not sure what happened, but this stock plummeted big time. Still a valuable member of the defensive and maybe a fall guy for an entire units problems, but I'm advising everyone to get out.

BUY: Brad Johnson taking the hit and delivering the pass - It's what every coach wants their QB to do. That hit certainly doesn't feel good, but the completion will make up for the pain.

SELL: Brad Johnson taking a sack - Around the league, guys who take sacks instead of throwing the ball away, are usually thought of as stat hungry. I don't know if it's the case with Johnson, but he's got to do a much better job of getting rid of the ball.

BUY: Keyshawn Johnson - Not the huge hitting stock because of the no TD facto,r but a consistent, solid look for your portfolio.

SELL: Jacquez Green - Injuries and mediocre play once again. He needs to become more of a force or Keyshawn will be doubled every game.

BUY: The new Bucs red baseball hats - Great look. Much better than the black. Matches most anything you might have in your wardrobe. Just don't get caught in South Central Los Angeles with one. You know, the whole gang thing.

SELL: Tony Dungy's windbreaker - Although I'm in a dying breed of people who defend Dungy's coaching, I can't defend his 80's windbreaker. A long sleeve coaching shirt, a golf shirt, even a Jackie Sherrill coat and tie would be better than that atrocity.

BUY: Todd Yoder's concussion - Not that I would want anyone to be injured, but I think it's safe to say the Bucs will survive if Yoder can't play.

SELL: Todd Yoder not having a concussion - You might have to explain to buyers who Todd Yoder is, but definitely dump it now.

BUY: Warren Sapp bobbleheads - The person who creates it will undoubtedly earn their money. Instead of a box, it will come in a sack. In fact we could finally say "Sapp in on the sack."

SELL: Martin Gramatica's 69 yard Field goals - If 69 yd FG's were so easy, people would've kicked them before. A high risk stock not for the casual buyer.

BUY: Pitch outs and screen passes to Alstott/Dunn - Why not? They're available. The running game obviously isn't working, we might as well think outside the box.

SELL: Running behind Kenyatta Walker and Randall McDaniel - The first round draft pick and the perennial pro bowler aren't getting anything done. It's not a stretch to say that the Bucs run blocking might be the worst in the league.

After large doses of the movie Wall Street and some Bucs film work, I give you my sterling advice. Have fun and may the money be on your side.


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