The Justice Files

Greetings and welcome to this week's installment of "The Justice Files." Happy April 20th, by the way. For those of you who weren't aware that Thursday was a holiday, allow me to explain. Apparently, 4:20 is the universally ideal time to smoke pot. I'm not sure exactly how this was determined, but I can only imagine that it required smoking during every other minute of the day to evaluate the optimum effect. Nonetheless, it is the stoner's special day.

So when you see some skeevy kid with a Humboldt County College hat and a sign with the interstate sign "Route 420" emblazoned on his shirt walking past, shake his hand, give him a hug or buy him a taco. He probably needs it.

Today, I've also seen reports that Pamela Anderson has gone back with David Binn. Apparently Steven Dorff is now the odd man out. It's no great honor for our long snapper to beat out a C-lister, but the whole affair is still impressive nonetheless. The draft is only a day away and A.J. Smith has his poker face on. Erasmus James, Marcus Spears, Shawne Merriman—there's no question that the Bolts want a defensive end that can get to the quarterback. I don't know much about these guys, but I'd be a little wary about taking someone with the last name "Spears" from Louisiana. I don't want him showing up all pasty and fat for training camp.

We're not hearing as much talk about Braylon Edwards or any of the wide receivers any more. I think the Chargers would still like to pick a guy that can stretch the field, but it's doubtful that there will be any of the "blue chips" left when we pick at #12. A.J. revealed that he's gotten an offer to trade up, but it's not likely that he'd do that for anyone in this year's bunch. I've also read a little about the Bolts selecting a tackle. Paul "Dr. Z" Zimmerman has them picking Khalif Barnes from Washington. I'm not adverse to us upgrading our offensive line.

One aspect of the playoff loss that hasn't really been talked about a lot is how the o-line got pushed around a lot. John Abraham didn't even play in that game. Houck is in Miami and Carl Mauck is back in San Diego. Did our line overachieve last season? They handled Jacksonville and Indianapolis pretty well and they have some serious pass rushers. Jim Steeg mentioned to me that LaDainian Tomlinson took the entire offensive line to Hawaii with him. There's no question that they all deserved it. I just wish they'd opened up a few more holes for Tomlinson in January. Actually, Jim Steeg also mentioned that David Binn went to the Pro Bowl to surf. Could a guest spot on FOX's "Stacked" be far behind?

That's all for now. Sorry that I don't have some meaty draft analysis for you. But I've made no secret of the fact that it's not really my thing. This installment of "The Justice Files" is dedicated to Franklin, the puppet from "Arrested Development." If you watch the show, tell FOX you want it back. If you don't, watch the reruns this summer.

Everything I do, I do it for you.

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