STRIPPED-DOWN: The Latest on Pacman

IRVING, Texas -- "Conventional wisdom'' says that hopeful Cowboy cornerback Pacman Jones is "more likely to get in trouble in Dallas because the city boasts 44 strip clubs.'' My research into strip clubs says "conventional wisdom'' is wrong.

Forty-four strip clubs. Is that a lot? Too few? Should the Dallas Chamber of Commerce be embarrassed by the number? Proud of the number?

Rather than just continue to take the mainstream media's word for it, I decided to do a little research. (No, not in person. On the internet.) The principles in Pacman's situation – the Cowboys, the Titans and NFL commissioner Roger Goodell – continue to lay the groundwork for an eventual trade. Pacman is not pushing for immediate reinstatement, saying he's willing to wait until after a trade. Tennessee is reportedly pushing to milk something more from the deal than a mid-round pick, maybe related to signing-bonus relief.

Dallas owner Jerry Jones is now so cozy with the idea of the troubled kid gaining employment at Valley Ranch that he sounds avuncular as he refers to the player as "Adam.''

"In this particular case,'' Jerry says of the situation, it's about "Adam basically getting in position to get on the field and being able to play. We had success with the Cowboys in that area … I know we've had some really good players with a change of scenery, a different situation come in and do well.''

Jerry's talking about Pacman's penchant for malevolent behavior – especially when he's ends up in a strip club.

"I'm encouraged,'' said Goodell, "by some of the things I'm hearing. But I will meet with him before training camp starts to gauge personally some of things he's doing. … He had a hiccup. …''

Odd choice of words from the commish.

The "hiccup'' amounted to accusations from a woman that he hit her while they were in Atlanta at. … yes, a strip club.''

Said Goodell: "He made a mistake. We met with him again. He understands that. Like I say, I'm encouraged by some of the things he's doing.'' There is no guarantee of a trade. There is no guarantee of a reinstatement. There is no guarantee that Pacman Jones in a Dallas uniform will be a cure-all for all involved.

But I give you one guarantee: Dallas' famous/infamous strip-club scene will not be the culprit in any failures Pacman experiences.

Here's why:

Dallas reportedly has 44 strip clubs.

Portland – with a fraction of the DFW population – boasts 50 strip clubs.

The Canton, Ohio area has 36 strip clubs. (No wonder so many old-time players like visiting the Hall of Fame.)

The tiny state of West Virginia (Pacman's home state, I guess I should point out) is home to 53 strip clubs.

Dallas might have the best strip clubs. But we don't have the most. And besides, how many strip clubs does it take for one hell-bent man to "make it rain'' there? In Halifax, Nova Scotia, there is one strip club. If Pacman has his mind set on it, and was playing for the Halifax Baby Seals, you don't think he'd find that one club?

I find it amusing that members of the media, in particular, believe people shouldn't hang out at strip clubs – unless, I guess, said "people'' happen to be members of the media. Nevertheless, such establishments seem to bring out the worst in Pacman Jones. … and I'm simply pointing out that such establishments are as likely to do that in Portland, Canton, West Virginia and Halifax as in Dallas.

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