Don't do drugs kids.
And especially when you're near a hungry alligator.
According to the Boston Leader, 52-year-old Frank Canfield cut his privates - yeah, those privates - off following a five day meth smoking binge.
What happened next was described to a journalist on the seen by an unnamed investigator. He said, "“In the footage (from a CCTV), we can see Mr Canfield alongside the canal that runs behind his property. In his hand he’s holding his genitals, we believe. At this point, he spots an alligator on the opposite side of the canal, and he flings his genitals in that direction.”
And, yeah, the gator ate 'em.
Canfield faces drug charges after his recovery.
Can you recover from something like that?
Don't do drugs kids!